I am only attracted to women who look good in a bikini

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AnnieO

Shooting from the Hip
I wear a size 4... But I don't have a rear end. Or waist.

When buying a bikini, I have to buy small bottoms and medium or large tops. And I am NOT well endowed. Just built like a stick.

So... That being said... I shop in the Juniors' section because none of them have rear ends either. Well, except for my daughter. LOL!

I still look awful in a bikini. Because of my stick shape no matter what I wear it creates a muffin top unless it's too baggy and then it falls down.

I have love handles. I don't really care. husband likes me, and honestly, if some guy is THAT shallow... He doesn't have enough brains to be with me anyway. I don't do stupid.

Looks are nice at first glance. But if there's nothing behind them - or worse, stupidity or evil - count me out.

...I noticed husband's surfer hair and rear end first... And then his laptop - I AM talking about computer here... The joke is I had him at the word BIOS... He's no Chippendale - thank goodness - but he's mine. And he's got a brain!
 

Abbey

Spork Queen
Nice, Step2. Sounds like you have a keeper.;)

I had to have my daughter tell me what a muffin top was. I didn't know I owned one!! I'm rich!:peaceful:

Abbey
 

witzend

Well-Known Member
Ultimate reality check. I'd chip in a few bucks to have that happen.

If only L was in Arizona. She could look good in a bikini. Get him to buy her some clothes, dinners, and maybe a car, then she could tell him how she's only attracted to men who don't have their head up their hoo-haw.
 

GoingNorth

Crazy Cat Lady
I think for the ED drugs the "desire" has to be there for them to work. They just help out with the hydraulics, so to speak.

So, if a guy was totally turned off, using an ED drug wouldn't help unless he could psychiatric himself into being attracted.

That said, the guy is a schwanz (that means "tail" in German, and something considerably more vulgar in Yiddish), and you are doing well to be shed of him.
 

graceupongrace

New Member
I could not agree more. I want nothing more to do with him, and I am super glad I found out this early in the game that he was such a heel, before I really fell for him.


I know, that in reality, I am not ready for a relationship. I need to work on healing, and on my self esteem, before "dating".

Steely,

Got to tell you, the fact that you want nothing more to do with him shows a ton of self-esteem. You're further along than you even realize.

Hugs!
 

nuone

New Member
ROFL LMAO....haven't laughed this much in ages. Thank you. I certainly know where to come for those "lost for words" moments.......hahahahaha.

As for the "bikini man" well what man! - there is nothing manly about him -his issues are surely bigger than his ego, which is bigger than anything else he possesses.
 

Abbey

Spork Queen
You know, on further thought, I think you should post his email address and we'll all go to town.:surprise:

Abbey
 

Steely

Active Member
Good god...........wouldn't that be the best!
We are all such fighters - I would hate for any person to mess with our collective forcefield. :faint:
CD Board Members United is a power no one wants to reckon with!!!!!
 

nuone

New Member
Of course Steely - and just think we learned from the masters - our difficult child's...man do we know some tricks.
 

Abbey

Spork Queen
I think for the ED drugs the "desire" has to be there for them to work. They just help out with the hydraulics, so to speak.

So, if a guy was totally turned off, using an ED drug wouldn't help unless he could psychiatric himself into being attracted.

That said, the guy is a schwanz (that means "tail" in German, and something considerably more vulgar in Yiddish), and you are doing well to be shed of him.

You need to turn this term into dictionary.com. I looked it up and couldn't find anything. (I'm a word nerd.) I know German, but not Yiddish. The best I could come up with is Shvantz. (Don't google.)

Where is Star when you need her?

Abbey
 

GoingNorth

Crazy Cat Lady
Sorry Abbers, my spelling is from colloquial German. You have the correct "textbook" spelling.

The Yiddish version is spelled phonetically using Hebrew characters...sigh. I'm actually illiterate in my native tongue.

The correct German usage IS "tail", but it sounds like the vulgar version has been reincorporated back into German...I am not going to Google it. I know what it means, LoL

Jews lived in Germany and the rest of Europe for hundreds and hundreds of years and Yiddish basically grew out of ancient German.

You now have a lot of Yiddish mixed back into German which can get weird. I had a heckuva time when I first moved to Germany as I used to get the two languages mixed up all the time and there's some errrr...."interesting" translations.

"Schmuck" actually means "Costume Jewelry" in proper German, literally a "pendant" or "charm" like you would wear on a necklace or bracelet.

It's the source of a couple of dirty jokes in Yiddish as a result.

I can come up with a few other descriptive terms for this jerk that I am pretty sure aren't in dictionary.com, but I have no idea how to spell them, just how to pronounce them and what they mean.
\

That said, the guy is pond scum.
 

totoro

Mom? What's a difficult child?
"Dump the Chump".

Steely you are beautiful because you are a woman and a Mother and because you have so much inside of you.
I have seen what you look like and I am dumbfounded that he would say this.
I have seen sexy women of all sizes. I have seen a man take the sexy out of a woman and no man should ever hold that power.
They can make us feel sexy, but should never be able to take it away.

You strut your butt by him and know you are better and that he doesn't deserve to see you in anything let alone naked! LOL
 

ThreeShadows

Quid me anxia?
GoingNorth and Abbey: See "Young Frankenstein", the scene in which they discuss the possibility of the creature having greatly enlarged body parts "he vould 'ave an enormous Schwanzstucker". It seems it's not a real word.

I was taught that Yiddish has its origins in Mittelhochdeutsch. It's a great and expressive language, also a sneaky way to get around the ever vigilant Board Censor.:tongue:
 

Marguerite

Active Member
I hadn't heard of Mittelhochdeutsch. We studied Hochdeutch at school; my German brother in law spoke Plattdeutsch despite growing up in Berlin, because he spent so much time once he came to Australia, living in a German-speaking 'ghetto' populated by steelworkers from Hamburg. I have a friendand neighbour (Australian-born of Australian-born parents) who has an Aspie-like fascination for self-teaching Plattdeutsch. As a result, I've been exposed to a certain amount of Plattdeutsch also. I find language and language development a fascinating topic.

Back to my much earlier point about treating this guy like a gay neighbour - what I meant was, be polite to him, don't be rude or horrible. Because Occupational Therapist (OT) be rude and horrible to him is to let him know that such remarks are capable of hurting you. And we nneed to build your self-esteem to the point where such remarks simply don't touch you, because they are not relevant. For example, if a bloke said to me, "I only go out with women who have blue eyes," my attitude to the bloke would be, "he only values eye colour? Then clearly my intellect, which I vlaue about myself, would be totally wasted on this fool. How sad it must be to live in that man's head and to only value such transitory physical attributes, instead of really enjoying the good companionship of another human being!"
There's no need to be hurt by this, because (as you have now discovered) he simply hasn't got enough going on between the ears, for his opinions or views to be relevant to you or of value to you. His attitude doesn't mean you have to cut him deador we all need Occupational Therapist (OT) be horrible to him - he clearly wouldn't understand why and it would only confirm in his mind that women in general are nasty creatures.

So if he loves to garden and you don't mind the odd bit of cultivation, then you could pass comments on how his pot plants are growing. But you now know (thank goodness) that for anything deeper than that, he simply hasn't got what it takes, to be worthy of being in a relationship with you.

Iinstead, lt him see you as a happy, strong person who is living a good and productive life, NOT involved with him simply because you're too much in demand from far more worthwhile partners.

Success is the best revenge!

by the way, I've also had good gay friends. as well as the ocasional really weird one. There have been times when I violently disagreed with things they said. Sometimes I spoke up, other times I didn't bother because I knew that my opinion on that matter would simply not be heard. And sometimes I found what was said to be so totallyalien that I had to reconsider how much time I was prepared to spend in the company of someone who thought so differently.
Such as when one friend confided in me that he planned to holiday in Rome, "because the boys are cheaper there."
Knowing he would never be able to afford to travel outside the country didn't make me feel any more comfortable in his company, after that. It just wasn't worth putting up with that sort of remark, simply to enjoy his good colour eye when I took him shopping for my new wardrobe.

My skin still crawls when I remember that.

Marg
 

Abbey

Spork Queen
GoingNorth and Abbey: See "Young Frankenstein", the scene in which they discuss the possibility of the creature having greatly enlarged body parts "he vould 'ave an enormous Schwanzstucker". It seems it's not a real word.

I was taught that Yiddish has its origins in Mittelhochdeutsch. It's a great and expressive language, also a sneaky way to get around the ever vigilant Board Censor.:tongue:

Laughing my bootie off. I love that movie. Nice way of getting around the board censor. I need to hone in my Mittelhocdeutshch language. I'll drive my friend nuts with this.

Abbey
 

DammitJanet

Well-Known Member
Marg....Now she is going to be remarking on his POT PLANTS! LMAO!!!!

Now we know why he is so stuck on the bikini stage. He is a pothead who never grew up. He is still that teen boy wrapped up in the pot cocoon who thinks women are supposed to all be Baywatch girls.
 

totoro

Mom? What's a difficult child?
I have a horrible visual now of a guy sitting around with one hand down his pants and the other with his hand wrapped around a honey bear bong....
watching "Boobwatch" with that Beavis and Butthead laugh- Huh-Huh...
and German vulgarities being thrown about in the next condo!!! LOL
 
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