buddy
New Member
warning: whiney post
I actually woke this morning in tears. Dont even remember a dream.
I cried over two face book posts today.
So , I'm trying to figure out if I am just hormonal still or if it is all finally getting to me.... I felt a little like this only in the morning the day he first started the new school. Then I fell apart but specifically over the call from the police officer from the school one day...
Today is different. I feel that overall tired/sad/tears about every single thought kind of feeling, very unlike me. This happens every once in a while of course to me and probably everyone....it never stays more than a day or two but it still stinks to go through it.
I was feeling pretty confident that nothing is going to come of the complaint from psycho but now I am having a hard time pushing that out of my mind.
I got all of Q's therapies rescheduled for the closer site and got busing arranged then got an email saying to make sure I include the transportation director in any bus changes for Q. I am so good about making sure everyone knows abou things that I had emailed the schedule to the school and they forwarded it to our district who I suppose assumed I had not already called busing. NO BIG DEAL but I took it so personally, like people were thinking I made a mistake, and OH MY WORD even if that had happened who the heck cares??? It is just my mood.
Then the teacher casually says that schedule sounds grueling and I am feeling super defensive. Like he is criticizing me. I think he has no clue how things go if we dont have something scheduled. How Q refuses to come in the house, causes a scene (which I wont say because I dont want any negative notes if he has to go to court, sigh), and I have to stay and play, coach all social interactions for hours and hours. now THAT is grueling.
As it worked out...here is our schedule
1. I pick him up
2. we get a snack
3. we go to the therapy center for one or two hours
4. we go home.
Some days I bring him home, some days Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) gets him and they can go do whatever htey want like he has done for years and years and LOVES.
Same schedule every day but I suppose because one day it is Occupational Therapist (OT) and one day it is pt etc... it looks like a ton. Compared to my nieces and nephews who have tons of homework, athletics, clubs, gymnastics, dance, sleep overs, play dates, lessons, etc... I think one thing a day is not much.
For my typical family members free play and free time is relaxing and fun.. for us it is trauma and stress so this is far less grueling than that.
I can't believe how sensitive I feel about it. But I was feeling sensitive even before the email.
I need to shake it.
I actually woke this morning in tears. Dont even remember a dream.
I cried over two face book posts today.
So , I'm trying to figure out if I am just hormonal still or if it is all finally getting to me.... I felt a little like this only in the morning the day he first started the new school. Then I fell apart but specifically over the call from the police officer from the school one day...
Today is different. I feel that overall tired/sad/tears about every single thought kind of feeling, very unlike me. This happens every once in a while of course to me and probably everyone....it never stays more than a day or two but it still stinks to go through it.
I was feeling pretty confident that nothing is going to come of the complaint from psycho but now I am having a hard time pushing that out of my mind.
I got all of Q's therapies rescheduled for the closer site and got busing arranged then got an email saying to make sure I include the transportation director in any bus changes for Q. I am so good about making sure everyone knows abou things that I had emailed the schedule to the school and they forwarded it to our district who I suppose assumed I had not already called busing. NO BIG DEAL but I took it so personally, like people were thinking I made a mistake, and OH MY WORD even if that had happened who the heck cares??? It is just my mood.
Then the teacher casually says that schedule sounds grueling and I am feeling super defensive. Like he is criticizing me. I think he has no clue how things go if we dont have something scheduled. How Q refuses to come in the house, causes a scene (which I wont say because I dont want any negative notes if he has to go to court, sigh), and I have to stay and play, coach all social interactions for hours and hours. now THAT is grueling.
As it worked out...here is our schedule
1. I pick him up
2. we get a snack
3. we go to the therapy center for one or two hours
4. we go home.
Some days I bring him home, some days Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) gets him and they can go do whatever htey want like he has done for years and years and LOVES.
Same schedule every day but I suppose because one day it is Occupational Therapist (OT) and one day it is pt etc... it looks like a ton. Compared to my nieces and nephews who have tons of homework, athletics, clubs, gymnastics, dance, sleep overs, play dates, lessons, etc... I think one thing a day is not much.
For my typical family members free play and free time is relaxing and fun.. for us it is trauma and stress so this is far less grueling than that.
I can't believe how sensitive I feel about it. But I was feeling sensitive even before the email.
I need to shake it.