I am so scared for

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Just keep swimming, Dec 20, 2007.

  1. Just keep swimming

    Just keep swimming New Member

    my Aly! Aly is losing touch with reality.

    Yesterday morning I got a call from my "sister" R, the adoptive mom of Jayme's sibs. Her girls and Aly go to the same school and after school enrichment program. They are all very close, call each other sisters.

    R said that Aly told her girls that their bio mom is looking for them, wants them back. Told them about a whole scenario that happened before they were detained where there was extreme and I mean seriously extreme, violent stuff going on. R's girls were obviously very scared and upset by this whole thing.

    I spoke immediately to Aly's mental health provider and she said that Aly has seemed to her that she is losing touch with reality or making up a new reality. Said I should use my judgement at how best to talk with Aly about this situation but might make things worse by bringing this up at all. I did my best not to talk to her about it, but I am so upset about the whole thing about how much she has frightened my "nieces".

    This morning, on the way to school, Aly said she has been having alot of "flashes" lately. When I asked her what that meant, she said "You know like bright lights, and then flashes, like a memory". I asked if that has happened at school or after school program, she said yes, all the time.

    Then as calmly as I could, I asked her to please not talk to the girls about their bio mom, let them talk with their R mom about that stuff. She screamed, grabbed my arm and asked why I said that. I had to tell her that R had told me that she spoke with the girls the day before and that they were very upset about it. I didn't go into any details, just reiterated that she is not to talk with them about their bio mom anymore.

    Then she said "Why, I was there too? I hid under the bed with L when H was killed by the police man. I was in the car when bio mom and g'pa were arrested."

    Then I asked her when she thought she joined our family. and she said "You adopted Jayme and me at the same time"

    I said "Aly, I was there when you were born, held you while you were taking your first breaths, changed your first diaper, got you dressed in a cute little dress to take you home, you were not with the girls until Jayme joined our family, you were with us and you were 7 years old when Jayme came to live with us and her sisters went to live with Auntie R"

    Her eyes got huge and she said that was not true, I am lying, she remembers perfectly being a baby with her bio mom.

    She was getting visibly upset so I just hugged onto her and took her into the school psychiatric office and she is still with her right now. I came home to get out of my jammies and called her mental health crisis coordinator. MHCC just called me back and said that she spoke with Aly's psychiatrist and they feel she needs an emergency referral to a Neurologist, if not hospitalization. over the phone, it sounds to them like she is having nearly non-stop seizure activity and that is probably skewing her reality. I have a call into her Pediatrician, she usually calls me back pretty quickly. School psychiatric is supposed to call me back to see if Aly can make it through her school day or if I should come get her.

    I honestly am so scared talking with all these professionals, it is throwing me back into PTSD of 2 years ago when I "trusted" the professionals in Aly's life and it backfired. But I am petrified of not talking with them as I feel my Aly is disappearing before my eyes.

    husband and I talked last night and we both agree that she may need to be on home study. She is just too anxious all the time at school and the after school program.

    Weird thing is, last night Aly told us she ended up having a fun day at the after school program. I dunno!!!

    Well, gotta go get dressed and prepare for what may be a marathon doctor day. Will update when I know more. Thanks for reading, if you made it all the way through this book!!

    Thanks and hugs,
  2. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    Oh Vickie, I am sorry for what poor little Aly is feeling. Her mind. I hope she can get back to reality soon. I know the few times K has lost touch how hard it is... It just rips my heart out.
    Hang in there... I am glad you have a team, I hope they can do what is best for her this time.
  3. FinallySeekingPeace

    FinallySeekingPeace New Member

    I'm new here and don't have any real advice for you.. but I wanted to offer you hugs! Reading this put tears in my eyes.. your sweet girl needs lots of hugs too!

    I can totally relate to feeling like you are watching your child slip away before your eyes, I feel quite frequently that I am losing my son.

    Please be open to the help they offer.. you can pick and choose what to take and what not to take. I'm sure you are a good mommy to her and will do what is right.
  4. mum2JK&TH

    mum2JK&TH New Member

    Vicky, I am so sorry for what's going on with Aly. Hopefully your team of doctors will figure out what's causing it.

  5. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member

    Oh Vicky,

    Im so sorry for what you and your family are going through with this latest bout with Aly. I cant imagine watching as your daughter looses touch with what you know is reality. It would be hard enough if she was loosing herself into a good fantasy world but this is horrible event that she is forcing herself to supposedly relive.

    I will be keeping you and her in my thoughts.
  6. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member

    Sending good thoughts out to you and Aly! HUGS!
  7. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member

    Sorry Vicky. I know she's on two seizure medications, but the flashes sound like they might be breakthrough seizures? The scary stuff is that she's losing touch with reality. I hope you can get her back on track.
  8. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Awwwww, Viki. Poor Aly. I so feel for her. No words of wisdom, but I hope you have a happy holiday and that somebody can figure out what's wrong with your precious girl and help her. You take care too. You really handled her well and with lots of love. (((Hugs)))
    A late thought: Is the Septra anything like an allergy medication with Cortisone? If so, they can really cause problems in mood disordered folks...
  9. Just keep swimming

    Just keep swimming New Member

    Thanks all! No update really, just lots of phone calls to all school staff who need to know. School nurse assistant did say that Aly has been in her office alot lately and that last night she was thinking about her and thought she was seeing seizures. All documented!

    MWM, Septra is an antibiotic to keep her from getting bladder and or kidney infections, she takes it daily and has for several years.

  10. nvts

    nvts Active Member

    Vicky, log me in for prayers as well. Please know that we're all pulling for you and Aly!

  11. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    Vicky, honey,

    Immediate prayers for you and Aly that something clicks with her soon. Prayers for your comfort. I am so sorry, this is just heartbreaking.
  12. tammyjh

    tammyjh New Member

    I'm so sorry to hear that your daughter is having such a hard time.
    My thoughts an prayers go out to you.
  13. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911


    Hugs for you and Aly. I don't know so much about what Aly is suffering, but I do know that those flash backs can make you feel so in the moment - sometimes our dreams and our reality cross and make us feel like we've been somewhere - Aly seems like she's in some sort of disassociative state possibly due to (?) The (?) is the millon dollar question. You will figure it out.

    Do you think that hypnosis would help her or maybe something more intense like EMDR therapy? I know you have suffered because of the doctors - but I'm sending you my spare warrior Mom suit - and sword. (double edged just like my tongue) and a prayer too.

  14. mom_in_training

    mom_in_training New Member

    Vickie so sorry that you are going through this, You, Ali and family are in my prayers in the hopes that this can be resolved. I might be off base here but you said that she takes Septra</span>, Could it be possible that the antibiotic is interacting with her two seizure medications therefore weakening the seizure medications ability to control her seizure activity if in fact this is what could be happening?

    I recall a while back when my son had a gum infection after dental care that they were very careful to choose the appropriate antibiotic that would not have any interactions with his seizure medications. My son takes Keppra, Dilantin and the newest... Trileptol.

    He was prescribed Tetracycline and I saw no indication of any adverse effects. At that time he was on Keppra and Dilantin. Thank god the Tetracycline cleared up his gum infection.
  15. Stella Johnson

    Stella Johnson Active Member

    I really think you need to talk to the docs about the antibiotic she is on. Antibiotics always cause problems with my difficult child too. There has to be something better out there to help with the bladder problems.

    I'm so sorry to hear Aly is having so many problems. Home school of some kind may help with this. Maybe it will take some of the pressure off of her until she can get stabilized again.


  16. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful


    I'm so very sorry Aly is in crisis. I know I'd be scared too, it's got to be heart wrenching to watch and not know what's going on.

    Saying prayers docs get this figured out quickly and resolved.

    Many ((((hugs))))
  17. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Riiiiiiiight. Duh. Sorry, Vickie.
    Hey, were you given any information about the birthparents? I know you saw her birth, so did you have a good enough relationship that BM told you about her and boyfriend's family tree? It's amazing how the birthfamilies of our adopted kids haunt us even when we raise them!
  18. mom_in_training

    mom_in_training New Member

    I am usually really good at keeping track of my sons seizure activity and thought to look at last years calender from Sept-Dec 2006. He was on Septra for the gum infection but it did not work if I am remembering right and this is why he was eventually put on the Tetracycline. My difficult child has the car at work with my keys to my closet where I have my file cabinet so I cannot look until she gets home later. Cannot recall if his seizures increased while on the Septra or not, If so I would have it jotted down on the calender. Now I want to know.... It could very well be of some help for Aly if in fact it could be seizure related.

  19. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    Sending big hugs..........and lot's of thoughts strength your way. So sorry.
  20. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Saying some prayers for Aly and you! I hope she starts to improve soon. Hugs.