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<blockquote data-quote="mom_to_3" data-source="post: 75187" data-attributes="member: 30"><p>I have different feelings than the others. We are in a similar situation with our Grandson in that we used to see him often and about a year ago, his father (who has custody) and his other Grandparents decided to use our beautiful Grandson as a pawn against us. They lied to us and spoke and treated us badly. I was shocked! I guess they needed to feel they had the upper hand with us or something.</p><p></p><p>As much as it hurt us, I decided that we will no longer participate in that kind of a relationship. I will not be threatened or screamed at by ignorant people. We absolutely love and adore our Grandson. Sadly, we decided that we would have to "love him" from afar as we would not participate in all the nastiness his father and other Grandparents were spewing. We stepped back and out of every one's lives and did not see our Grandson for almost a year.</p><p></p><p>A week ago, we were called and asked if we wanted to set up permanent visitation to see our Grandson. I have yet to speak to his father and will never speak to the other grandparents as long as I live, but our Grandson's step mother called us. She had also participated in the nastiness. She apologized and I accept that. I did tell her my feelings and told her we would never participate if they all wanted to fight and have chaos. We aren't those kind of people. I told her we love our Grandson and would prefer to love him personally, but if need be, we were prepared and willing to "love him from afar".</p><p></p><p>Children belong with their parents. Their parents may not do it my way or to my liking, but there are many ways to parent and that is okay as long as the children are not harmed. We chose if we want to be a part of that situation. The priority is the children, not our feelings.</p><p></p><p>Do what's in the best interest of your Grandchildren, don't act out of spite or anger. I'm not saying that is what you are doing, but it could be easy to do.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="mom_to_3, post: 75187, member: 30"] I have different feelings than the others. We are in a similar situation with our Grandson in that we used to see him often and about a year ago, his father (who has custody) and his other Grandparents decided to use our beautiful Grandson as a pawn against us. They lied to us and spoke and treated us badly. I was shocked! I guess they needed to feel they had the upper hand with us or something. As much as it hurt us, I decided that we will no longer participate in that kind of a relationship. I will not be threatened or screamed at by ignorant people. We absolutely love and adore our Grandson. Sadly, we decided that we would have to "love him" from afar as we would not participate in all the nastiness his father and other Grandparents were spewing. We stepped back and out of every one's lives and did not see our Grandson for almost a year. A week ago, we were called and asked if we wanted to set up permanent visitation to see our Grandson. I have yet to speak to his father and will never speak to the other grandparents as long as I live, but our Grandson's step mother called us. She had also participated in the nastiness. She apologized and I accept that. I did tell her my feelings and told her we would never participate if they all wanted to fight and have chaos. We aren't those kind of people. I told her we love our Grandson and would prefer to love him personally, but if need be, we were prepared and willing to "love him from afar". Children belong with their parents. Their parents may not do it my way or to my liking, but there are many ways to parent and that is okay as long as the children are not harmed. We chose if we want to be a part of that situation. The priority is the children, not our feelings. Do what's in the best interest of your Grandchildren, don't act out of spite or anger. I'm not saying that is what you are doing, but it could be easy to do. [/QUOTE]
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