Ok, after all my sighing and crying and grumping, one beautiful thing happened this week. I bought my daughter a flute. I didn't have it in mind when I set out to drive to the hairdresser's in another town, but on the way there it appeared and fluttered around in my brain and became a solid thought - to surprise daughter with a step-up flute. She's been playing the beginner-rental flute-with-a-big-dent that we originally rented for easy child 2, for several years. I bought easy child 2 a step-up flute when he was in 7th grade and he's gone on to do wonderful things with it. Somehow I forgot to do the same thing for easy child 3. Must have been the stress of difficult child finding drugs and cutting and refusing medications. My daughter has never asked for, much less demanded, a better flute. easy child 2 left his better flute for her when he went to college this fall, and she's enjoyed it tremendously. Then, last weekend, easy child 2 asked for his flute back so that he could audition for concert band at university. He misses his music. Can't blame him. daughter gave up the better flute with barely a grumble. And she took the original, lousy flute to school this week without a single comment or complaint. So I went and spent some $$ on a new flute for her and surprised her with it after school ... and her SMILE, and her TEARS, and her HUGS AND KISSES were ... enough to make me wish I'd done it earlier. I keep trying not to forget my PCs in all the turmoil. I'm glad I got it right this week.