I Cant believe my Kids

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Jen, Sep 28, 2007.

  1. Jen

    Jen New Member

    Never did I think that I would go from 1 difficult child, which is way too much, to 2 difficult child'S. I used to speak so highly of my easy child daughter, and how she has always stepped up to the plate in times of advertisment. I must have had blinders on.
    Most recently in the last year she has become slowly a difficult child. She no longer wants to be with the guy she is married to, entrusted her son to him, with our support, and went off to find herself in the Army. During her time their her mind has went to, I miss my husband and son, to lets party, and run through the money, to not wanting her husband anymore( She told him they are officially seperated and now can date), to finding herself a new guy ( someone else married and seperated from his wife, with a trouble with the law record, a misdameanor, with a wealthy family, he tells her?)to, I am foing to send for my son but doesnt want her husband to bring him, and check out the place he will be living, with impending deployment next April.

    My son , the real difficult child in all his glory is just loving all of this. My sister in law and grandson have been staying at their small place, so alot of conversations going on there. My son is loving it, involving himself in it, and calling me to tell me that my daughter his sis, is doing quite the opposite of what she tells me in regards to finances, and her persoanl life. That my sister in law is aware of all that is going on, because she has told him. It is so their own business and not my sons.

    My sister in law as I have said before is just so out there. He obviously confides in my son, that has no room to talk. But my son talks about my sister in law behind his back, and how and what he suld do, like move in with them, adn get a job in their town. Then my sister in law brings my grandson ove for us too take care, which is fine with us, and he goes to a daycare, but wont say much to us. If he thinks he is going to be around us he always has someone with him. It is so awkward. He is still working but puts in less hours. Doesnt even work 40 hours, and says he has no intentions of moving to where my son lives.My sister in law will stay here like before while we are on vacation with his son, and watch the house. I am not sure what his plans are after that. My daughter cant believe that I would let him do this, because he has been a real poo to us, but I would do it for my grandson only.

    Everything lately has just been so wired and awkward on top of the feeling that we are being decieved by all. Yes I know detach, but actually I am just at the "I cant beleive it stage". Like having a new difficult child.

  2. goldenguru

    goldenguru Active Member

    Just curious how old your daughter is?

    Statistically, when 'children' marry and have children at a young age, they miss entire developmental periods of their lives. Perhaps your daughter is feeling very tied down by marriage, parenthood, being in the service and life in general. I know this doesn't excuse her behavior ... but maybe gives a little tiny insight into the whys.

    I'm sorry this puts you in such an awkward position. It is so difficult when there are precious, innocent grandkids involved.