I did it. It was easy. husband determined to send $ to difficult child son, only wants amount to be what is needed for rent and power, not full $1700. So, I FB difficult child son that info and told him I did not want to give him any money. told him he needed to stand up and be a man. Told him he needed to be making enough money to help with his grandmother, visit his mother (that would be me) and help with his sister. Told him he was making beggars of himself and his children. I don't know what else I told him. Nothing personally nasty, just the truth I believe. Kept trying to get the needed amount out of him, as husband insistent on helping to "get this over with and stop thinking about it." difficult child son says I am mean. Says we will never see any of them again. Says they will starve and die before taking money from us. Well, halleluiah. Added a few more insults for me. Nothing as horrifying as what he said before we gave him money last time. I imagine he is reeling from shock. Cedar IT WAS EASY. Also, had already given difficult child info on help available, including the suggestion to ask school counselor for help with eviction and Christmas gifts for kids. I am starting to feel a little horrible. But if difficult child son is ever going to stand up, this enabling has to stop.