my son as I was yesterday! husband makes plans to visit wm every Sunday. Rain or shine, husband always has some kind of one on one activity with wm. wm called Saturday to make sure husband was coming to see him. husband & wm made plans to go kite flying. husband had picked up a really cool box kite to put together & they were going to walk out to the park on a bluff & fly it. It was a beautiful day for it yesteday. husband & wm must have talked on Saturday 3 or 4 times about the kite & the outing (which included an ice cream Sunday afterward). wm called just as husband was about to leave & told him not to come. He was going to a movie with his foster brothers & didn't want to go kite flying. husband was extremely disappointed but told wm it was his choice. wm wanted husband to come after the movie - too late in the afternoon wm chose the movie "bye dad". Well, as you guessed, wm called at 5 (in the midst of our making dinner) & wanted husband to come & take him kite flying. I picked up the phone & told the boy off. I don't believe in the 7 years that wm has been a part of our family I have ever been so angry. I told him that he blew it - he chose a movie over family. I didn't want to hear anymore that the only important thing he wants is to see family & maybe, just maybe come home. I didn't believe it. Unless you are ill, you don't beg off on your father. wm couldn't get a word in edgewise - I told him I loved him & hung up. wm called back crying - husband picked up the line. I don't know what was discussed. husband told me later that wm asked if I still loved him. husband reassured him but let wm know that I was very angry & disappointed in his choices. husband told wm that we make plans every weekend to visit (husband especially since I've been ill) but that I help husband plan the activities & look forward to hearing about afterward. I'll call wm later this week. I expect he'll have forgotten all about it as he lives life in the moment. I'm beyond tired of Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD), PTSD & issues of abuse & neglect. It has so splintered our little family. We work so hard to be a family of different addresses. We work hard to include wm each week with phone calls & visits on the weekend. I send letters with articles that I know he likes from Scientific American & other science, astrology & fossils to go along. I sure wish I could live life in the moment like my son. How cool would that be? Thanks for "listening".