One more day to the preliminary and I'm so nervous, I'm sick to my stomach. I lost like over 5 pounds in less than 1 week.
He is still driving me crazy telling me this might be his last weekend, etc. Still behving like a difficult child. You would think something would sink in there somewhere. I don't get it. Actually, I shouldn't say that, I do get it. He is addicted to pain pills and needs them, along with drinking. He needs help, not prison. I'm praying so hard that he gets that help out of all of this, not just for him but for the rest of my family.
It is destroying everything. And I know I'm an enabler. I know this and don't know how to stop or get out of this. It's just so hard. I watched a program on ON Demand last night called Inter, something, God I can't even remember the name. I live like this, the way this family lived. Never knowing what to expect every night, and not wanting to do tough love because they might wind up dead on the street and you'd never forgive yourself for it.
Please keep us in your prayers. I'm going alone with him, no one to go with me and I know I'll be a nervous wreck. So early in the morning. His bio dad does not know, he does't want his pop-pop to know because he is frail and elderly and loves his pop-pop so much, he doesn't want him to worry about him.
I'm thinking I definitly need to find some help. Would Al Alon be better or Nar Anon, does anyone have a preference?? He does drink, but it's the pain pills too, because he had two terrible injuries and he got addicted to them on top of the drinking and his bio dad is an alcoholic that is why I left him 15 years ago and raised my 3 boys alone. I need to get myself help too, I can't go on, I'm a mess, and constantly enabling him and my poor other kids it's just not fair all these years, I wish I was a stronger person than what I am, I know I've done more than a lot of people could have, but facing this demon is my weakness. That is what it is a demon in my life and it took over everything. I've lost control, I feel bad for him too, but bad for me and my other boys. I'm so afraid about tomorrow, it's terrible. I know I won't sleep well tonight and we have to be there at 8AM and could sit there half the day then I have an 3 month evaluation for my youngest at 3:30. I'll be going all day long, then the next day I have to leave work early and take my middle guy to the dentist to get his wisdom tooth pulled, waited for this appointment. for weeks now. He's been hurting but we had trouble getting an oral dentist lined up.
I've been doing a Novena to Our Lady of Lourdes. I've done many times before and just pray and pray that the outcome of this is that he gets to a rehab or something and strength for myself to get back control of my life.
He is still driving me crazy telling me this might be his last weekend, etc. Still behving like a difficult child. You would think something would sink in there somewhere. I don't get it. Actually, I shouldn't say that, I do get it. He is addicted to pain pills and needs them, along with drinking. He needs help, not prison. I'm praying so hard that he gets that help out of all of this, not just for him but for the rest of my family.
It is destroying everything. And I know I'm an enabler. I know this and don't know how to stop or get out of this. It's just so hard. I watched a program on ON Demand last night called Inter, something, God I can't even remember the name. I live like this, the way this family lived. Never knowing what to expect every night, and not wanting to do tough love because they might wind up dead on the street and you'd never forgive yourself for it.
Please keep us in your prayers. I'm going alone with him, no one to go with me and I know I'll be a nervous wreck. So early in the morning. His bio dad does not know, he does't want his pop-pop to know because he is frail and elderly and loves his pop-pop so much, he doesn't want him to worry about him.
I'm thinking I definitly need to find some help. Would Al Alon be better or Nar Anon, does anyone have a preference?? He does drink, but it's the pain pills too, because he had two terrible injuries and he got addicted to them on top of the drinking and his bio dad is an alcoholic that is why I left him 15 years ago and raised my 3 boys alone. I need to get myself help too, I can't go on, I'm a mess, and constantly enabling him and my poor other kids it's just not fair all these years, I wish I was a stronger person than what I am, I know I've done more than a lot of people could have, but facing this demon is my weakness. That is what it is a demon in my life and it took over everything. I've lost control, I feel bad for him too, but bad for me and my other boys. I'm so afraid about tomorrow, it's terrible. I know I won't sleep well tonight and we have to be there at 8AM and could sit there half the day then I have an 3 month evaluation for my youngest at 3:30. I'll be going all day long, then the next day I have to leave work early and take my middle guy to the dentist to get his wisdom tooth pulled, waited for this appointment. for weeks now. He's been hurting but we had trouble getting an oral dentist lined up.
I've been doing a Novena to Our Lady of Lourdes. I've done many times before and just pray and pray that the outcome of this is that he gets to a rehab or something and strength for myself to get back control of my life.