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I feel like the worst mother ever
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<blockquote data-quote="Second Time Around" data-source="post: 683277" data-attributes="member: 18739"><p>Please don't beat yourself up. Your daughter is fine. If it were really "bad parenting", both your kids would have problems and they don't. He may very well have an autism spectrum disorder or some other disability or mood disorder that is affecting how he handles things. Unfortunately, once our kids turn 18, they can refuse treatment and there is nothing you can do. Sometimes pushing them out of the home is what is necessary for them to make changes. They can get too comfortable at home and won't see the need to do things differently. You ARE helping him grow and change, even if it doesn't feel like it. It will take awhile and there will be ups and downs. He may make progress or he may not, but if he stays with you, there will definitely not be any progress. My husband's aunt, who is in her 80's had two of her four sons living with her until the past year. One has bipolar and the other is "quirky" They are in their 50's! Totally took advantage of her and fought all the time. She enabled and refused to do anything about it. Finally the sheriff got tired of coming out to break up fights and wrote a restraining order so the brothers couldn't be in the same house and one had to move out. You really, really do not want to be in this situation when you're in your 80's!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Second Time Around, post: 683277, member: 18739"] Please don't beat yourself up. Your daughter is fine. If it were really "bad parenting", both your kids would have problems and they don't. He may very well have an autism spectrum disorder or some other disability or mood disorder that is affecting how he handles things. Unfortunately, once our kids turn 18, they can refuse treatment and there is nothing you can do. Sometimes pushing them out of the home is what is necessary for them to make changes. They can get too comfortable at home and won't see the need to do things differently. You ARE helping him grow and change, even if it doesn't feel like it. It will take awhile and there will be ups and downs. He may make progress or he may not, but if he stays with you, there will definitely not be any progress. My husband's aunt, who is in her 80's had two of her four sons living with her until the past year. One has bipolar and the other is "quirky" They are in their 50's! Totally took advantage of her and fought all the time. She enabled and refused to do anything about it. Finally the sheriff got tired of coming out to break up fights and wrote a restraining order so the brothers couldn't be in the same house and one had to move out. You really, really do not want to be in this situation when you're in your 80's! [/QUOTE]
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