My daughter, 39, has not spoken to me in 2 1/2 years and has kept me from my grandkids. Today I was walking down Main St. and there she was sitting on some steps. I quickly ducked down another street. I got triggered. I have PTSD from both my childhood and being verbally abused by my daughter and DS and physically threatened by my DS. Freezing is my most typical response, and I feel unsafe. Later, I become upset with myself for not being angry at how badly they have treated me over the years. During one of his rages my son said that I become so timid. I don't call them names, take advantage of them, or be hurtful. Family and friends without hesitation say I have gone above and beyond to be supportive of them, and I should just detach. Does anyone else on this forum have this problem of going to sadness and fear instead of to justifiable anger? As much as I love my children, the less I have to do with them, the healthier I feel. I can't even imagine a time when things will be healed.