i gotta get a life!

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Jena, Oct 3, 2008.

  1. Jena

    Jena New Member

    I realized with things being so calm at least at night past two nights with my little person I've had time to think and realized that the free weekends i have without difficult child when she's at her dad's i have no life lol. literally.

    I go to blockbuster, I food shop, do laundry, spend time just breathing and enjoying the quiet yet I have no life and i'm only 38. I got together with a friend a few weeks ago which was healthy, she made me do it actually came here and dragged me out!! :)

    Yet the friends I had are pretty much no more except the married ones with whom I can only spend time with when our kids are having "playdates", i cant do double dates because he's never home leaves 9 a.m. in the morning and gets home at midnight. except two tuesdays a mos we go to dinner, drinks. dont' get me wrong it's not horrible yet tuesdays' a quiet night and i have no desire to go out on a weeknight. plus i have difficult child to worry about.

    anyway back to me so i have no life. my ambition has been so low since handling difficult child and other stuff. I really should grow my business, figure out how to market myself. I only have one client now. I love what I do when I do it, yet i have 2 cases left just finalized last one yesterday. I've been making pocket change pocket money for week sort of thing. Yet if i added on a few more attorneys i'd be making a decent amount dependant upon amount of work they gave me. i know realistically i could make it grow i've learned so much the past 5 months things I never knew. I was also thinking of getting certified through the ny bar to be a court appointed guardian. The ideas are there yet the ambition isn't. I also miss hanging with friends in my free time the city, art galleries, antique stores out east. Yet so much has changed with everyone no one's around anymore. i also miss having a regular partner who is around to do and live life with me, regardless of all the other existing issues i'm contemplating.

    so i should be growing my business, doing stuff on the weekend even alone if need be.....yet i dont'? it's like when difficult child isn't around i forget how to be just me.
  2. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    On the rare occasions when Miss KT would be at her father's for the weekend, I would do a major cleaning of her room...even moved her furniture around! I look back now, and think, "What a big dummy! I could have called some friends, seen a movie, gone dancing, eaten a meal served to me on a plate instead of in a bag...anything but clean!"

    I understand.

    My vote is to grow the business, and find something interesting to do on the weekends you're without difficult child.
  3. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    Jennifer! Jennifer! Come Out Come Out Where Ever You Are!

    You have just received a wonderful gift - calm quiet evenings! Wow - you have been waiting and wishing for this but now that you have it, you don't know what to do with yourself.

    Dig down deep past the mommy and girlfriend Jennifers and pull your true just you out.

    Get on the internet and find out what is going on in the big city. Plan a day and invite your friend to come with.

    If you really truly love your business then do start growing it. The more experiences you have, the more opportunities will arise.

    Do you have a hobby? How about interest in volunteering?

    I am so happy for your new found freedom - It is important that we all have time to be our core self without the responsibility of being a parent, partner, employer, ect.
  4. Jena

    Jena New Member


    LOL.......i know i have been wanting it, dont' get me wrong. Yet it takes me a day to truly adjust to not having her. Yet i realized that when i don't have her like i said the friends are gone, so its me, myself and i. so i guess you are right if i have to do stuff alone than so be it, that's just the way it is right now.

    as far as growing the business is concerned it's difficult to figure out a way to market myself (outsourcing legal work) is a bit of a rough sell to most attorneys. I grabbed the client i have and it took a few mos. till trust was formed to get to where i am now with their office. The trust is at a very high level.

    i thought of cover letters introducing myself a mass mailing sort of thing, including articles stating why "outsourcing" is beneficial, etc. than follow up with a phone call. not sure.
  5. Jena

    Jena New Member

    ok i'm taking your advice....beginning to build the business. scanning various websites,and got a few leads already that i can work on from them. here we go, keeping fingers crossed. I"m not sure what i'm afraid of it really working possibly?
  6. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    Go Girl Go!!! How exciting! Keep us updated.
  7. Stella Johnson

    Stella Johnson Active Member

    I think all of us have been in the no life rut at some time or another. It is important to remember who you are for those few quiet moments we have.

    Keep us updated on your business!

  8. Jena

    Jena New Member

    hi guys thanks. i'd love to continue, yet reality hits at certain times and im not sure if i'll be able to at the same pace i have been. we shall see. if boyfriend and i decide to go our seperate ways i'll need a more steady income coming in to support kids.

    older difficult child got sick this weekend so i'm on nurse duty, surprise surprise free weekend filled by yet another kids needs lol :)