I hate homework!

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Californiablonde, May 18, 2012.

  1. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    So difficult child 2 has this HUGE biography assignment for history that's due next Friday. Writing is not difficult child's strong point as it is, so this is going to be a struggle. I think I am dreading this thing more than he is. Getting him to write is like pulling teeth, and more often than not I'm usually the one who does most of the work. I just checked out two books from our school library so he can start working on it this weekend. He will be at his dad's the majority of the weekend, and I am hoping I can get him to work on at least some of it while he is there. difficult children' dad dropped out of school in the ninth grade so I don't know how much help he will really be. School was never his "thing" either. I was a straight A student (except math, I pulled off a B in that one) so writing comes rather easy for me. That doesn't make it any easier to help a son who absolutely hates it and has no idea what he is doing. I am totally dreading this whole assignment. Ugh! I SO totally can't wait till summer.
  2. keista

    keista New Member

    Have I mentioned keyboard to you for the struggling writer? It won't work for everyone, but if he's comfortable on the computer, see if he's willing to type out his work. See if it's easier and/or better quality work. Sometimes the mechanics of writing just gets in the way.
  3. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    Keista, he is supposed to write it out beforehand and then type it out on the computer. Our computer at home doesn't work so he will need to do the typing part of it at school. I wish the writing wasn't necessary but that's the way she wants it. It's not only the actual writing that is hard for him. It's the summarizing. He wants to write down everything word for word in the book because he doesn't have any creative writing skills. He doesn't get the concept of plagarizing. I have to go over what he has written and make him re-do it because he tries to copy exactly what the book says. Writing always came easy for me so you would think it would be easy for me to explain all this to him, but he just doesn't get it.
  4. TeDo

    TeDo Guest

    CB, that is soooo common given his diagnosis's. Does he have an IEP at school? Neither of my boys can paraphrase worth a hoot. They do MUCH better with quoting and citing the sources. Can you talk to the teacher about composing on the computer. It seems redundant (to an Aspie) to me. My kids are allowed to type (we have voice-to-text on our computer) the rough draft as well as the final copy. difficult child 2 doesn't have an IEP but the teachers are accommodating him in this one area. For the paraphrasing, I have my kids read a few pages, give me the paper/book and have them tell me about what they read as I'm writing down what they say. It's their words and I can write faster. Then they take the things I wrote and organize everything by cutting the paper up and moving different sentences around. It works for us.
  5. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Excuse me?
    The writing IS NOT NECESSARY. Period.

    Yes, it is the way the teacher "wants" it.
    It is exactly what difficult child does NOT NEED and exactly what works against the learning that is supposed to be taking place.

    Grrrr.... some teachers.
  6. keista

    keista New Member

    Yeah, so was my son. Until I proved to them that he was faster and put out more and better quality work when he typed. Once I proved it to them, they provided him with a laptop. He's had one since 4th grade to use in school and can do all assignments on computer at home. (I force him to do math by hand).

    Like Tedo mentioned, there's also voice to text, or at home, you act as his scribe. Anything you can do to get past the mechanics of writing. Sure, paraphrasing may be difficult, but that's the part that you really want him working on and if you remove the other stress, then he can.
  7. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I was able to scribe for my son until middle school. Anytime I scribed, I signed the bottom of the assignment as a nod to "he spoke, I wrote".

    The keyboard was a great transition when he got into middle school. He could organize he thoughts so much better on the computer. He would save and print out his "first draft" and then go back and make his changes and corrections and print that out and hand them in - rough draft and final. He didn't feel overwhelmed when he was just making changes on the computer.

    His IEP said that he could use the computer for any lengthy assignment. Lengthy is subjective. But to a kid who struggles with dysgraphia and/or adhd, 3 paragraphs is lengthy! If you have the time, sit down and have him read it to you, or you can read it to him, and then have him tell you in his own words what he got out of it or what was important. You act as scribe and then let him take it to school and then type it.

    I think a change to his IEP might be in order to add accoms or mods with writing assignments.

  8. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    Well thanks for the suggestions. Unfortunately we do not have an IEP at this point. We meet on the 30th to see if he qualifies. Right now he gets no accomodations. I just saw the paperwork on Friday that he has to turn in....holy moly! It looks like something I would have done in hs, not fifth grade! Unfortunately the writing part is mandatory. He is supposed to type it out after he turns in the worksheets. We do not have a printer at home, so he is going to need to do it at daycare. Unfortunately he left his homework at his dad's over the weekend. He came to the car with all of his books when I picked him up, so I just assumed the papers were with him. They weren't. He didn't tell me until after we had already left his dad's. The soonest I will be able to pick it up from dad will be Wednesday evening after his psychiatrist appointment. Dad is not willing to drop it off at our house so we will have extra work to do on Wednesday and Thursday night because he can't work on it tonight or tomorrow. I think I am stressing over this more than he is at this point. difficult child doesn't care about his grades but I do!
  9. confuzzled

    confuzzled Member

    someone once had WONDERFUL words of wisdom here...maybe susie or marg...

    it was something along the lines that sometimes you have to weigh the value of the assignment and the weight it holds.

    if its a torturous 2 week assignment that will account for 10% of the grade, well, you might want to do what you can, but not stress and fight over it.

    if it holds 90% of the weight, well, you better start now, lol. obviously it would be the most important assignment of the year.

    odds are, its the first...so it might be well worth doing what he can, learning what he can, and taking the F for the team. (provided he's not in overall danger of failing)

    as with any difficult child, i actually wouldnt say any of that in the presence of one.

    (i have mightily paraphrased anything anyone might have actually said, but that was the jist of it, and it was a life lesson that *I* learned here, so excuse me for any liberties taken--i'm not as eloquent as whomever originally said it) :bigsmile:
  10. keista

    keista New Member

    I was the same exact way until I realized that as long as he's passing, grades don't really matter until HS. In primary and middle, you want to make sure your child is learning and passing, but the grade really has little relevance in the academic life.

    on the other hand once you hit HS, all the grade go to the graduation cumulative and this is important for college acceptance and scholarships.
  11. Californiablonde

    Californiablonde Well-Known Member

    I agree to a point that grades don't matter in elementary school. Regardless of what grade he is going to get on this assignment, he will still graduate on to middle school. I just don't want him to get used to doing half a**sed work because he has the mentality that grades aren't important anyway. difficult child 1 is was failing several classes this year and was in danger of not graduating 8th grade. I was SO totally stressed out over it but her teachers have done a great job helping her catch up. I just don't want to see my son struggle, but even if his grade for this assignment isn't as good as I hope it will be, I can accept that. As long as he puts forth some effort in it I will be fine.