I just keep saying "No"... and it's working

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by karisma, Feb 3, 2017.

  1. karisma

    karisma Member

    I just keep saying no.

    And it's working.

    It rolls off my tongue. No matter what the question is. "Can you meet me so I can straighten my hair?" my reply is "No".

    However, I admit I am going to give him a hair straightener so he can stop calling with this question.

    "Can you give me money for food?" Its not for food, by the way, and my answer is "No"

    "Can you afford to support me?" Same answer. And he said "Thank you for saying that. I love you mom. bye"

    My sponsor saw him sleeping on a bench on a popular street here for the street kids the other day. Cool. Glad he is alive and getting his rest. Glad he found a bench that doesn't have the dividers that the city is putting in on the bus stop benches that keep people from laying on them and thus keep the homeless from sleeping on them.

    I just don't know what else to say. Except "No"

    Believe me you guys, I want to say "yes", but that is not what he needs. I sleep in a beautiful bed in a beautiful house and when it's cold and raining here I wake in the middle of the night and wonder if my son is cold and shivering and wet.....and I hurt, like we all do, big time.

    I take psyche medications to get me through it.

    But I still say "No son, I can't do that"

    Love to you all
     
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  2. Copabanana

    Copabanana Well-Known Member

    Oh and so.
     
  3. Tanya M

    Tanya M Living with an attitude of gratitude Staff Member

    Well done Karisma!!
     
  4. UKMummy

    UKMummy Member

    And it's the only thing you can do and the best thing you can do for him. It goes against all off our maternal instincts but in the right situation, it's the right thing to do.
    Well done and keep strong.
     
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  5. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    I said no no no to my daughter to money, a car (she had been in three accidents) and shelter so she found shelter, got a job, and quit drugs, evrn cigarettes, twelve years ago. Today she is anti drug and doing great. If you cant say no, even when you cry later, i think they are slower to improve. And the ypunger they hear no, the younger they are to maybe stop the destruction.

    Kudos to you!