I kicked out my son now giving me hell

[cazza]

when my son was 8 i met a man and got married but the man used to say horrible vile things to me till i had enough and left and moved into a womans refuge .that was 3 years ago but my son for the last 3 years has given me hell calling me vile names for past 3 years (one being a C word ) .he has also stole of me .1st he stole my moblie phone and rang up a bill of 300 quid the last straw was nearly 2 weeks ago he stole 20 quid of me and denied it .he had brought booze and weed with it.so i called police he was arrested but let off with a caution.since then he had kicked a hole in my fence (twice ) kicking my door broke my doorbell and thearten me saying he is going to smash all the windows in etc.i have called the police out nearly 9 times but each time he gets arrested he is let of with a caution and comes straight back to mine damaging things and threating me .


i was so heartless when i kicked him out i spend hours trying to find him some where to live but every time he had to go for a interview to get a room he refused to go then he say to me i got no where to live iam hungry cold etc trying to make me feel gulity.

the thing is he could have some where to live but he refuses any help of anyone and then comes to my door every day still thinking iam a mug whos gonna let him back in.

Iam so sick of all this and so stressed i go to work feeling distressed and sad.

iam fed up that someone who is supposed to be my son wld call me vile names ,steal of me and give me 24h hell and now causes me harrasent and stress.

he says the police are no good and are stupid because all they do is arrest him and they let him go.

I WILL NEVER HAVE HIM LIVE WITH ME AGAIN

me and my daughter can have a peaceful life at last

but i still feel like i failed as a mother

HE IS 18 YEARS OLD nearly 18 and a half.

 

[GoingNorth]

I am guessing you are from the UK based on your language usage (My mum's British so I'm quite familiar with UK English). Is there anyway you could swear out something like an ASBO against him? Or does that require a court order as opposed to a parent request? There has to be some way to get what we call an "order of protection" against him.

Sorry you have to deal with this. In the US, we would advise calling the police for any damaging acts to property, or for theft. At his age he would be charged as an adult.

 

[BusynMember]

This happens even in good families. Your son has gone through a lot, but that doesn't excuse his namecalling and bad behavior. I am guessing he's involved in drugs and more than you know. Kids can be vile while taking drugs. in my opinion you did the right thing, making him leave. He is 18, you no longer have to live with that sort of abuse. You had it from a man and you don't need it from your son. He can get help with whatever his problems are...he is choosing not to.

I'm sorry you are going t hrough this.

 

[cazza]

god iam so mad and upset had to call police again today as this morning i had him thearting me again and on my way to bus stop to work he starting throwing stones at me threating me again.

i came back from work to find he had wreaked my garden destroyed and cut all my garden things up.
i caled police they were supposed to come out then i get phone call from police ataying they problem cant come out as they to busy with stuff .

i said i wanted them to come out and deal with him as was end of my tether and he started to get annoyed with me staying they had more important things to deal with and finally i just couldnt take no more and started sobbing on phone in which he then said he try and get someone out.

iam a pretty strong woman and it takes alot to make me cry .but ive come to the end of my tether and relise i actually dont want to have anymore to do with him no more till hes grown up and relised what he has done which in his case problem be years

i dont deserve this no more i have had enough

 

[Jody]

I am so sorry that you are going thru this. What a hard time. No one deserves this. I hope it gets better soon and you get a stress fee break. Hang in there.