i kicked school............

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Jena, May 1, 2009.

  1. Jena

    Jena New Member

    butt, hi am i allowed to say butt here?? LOL guess i'll find out!

    So, I went in today to difficult child's first cse eligibility meeting. there were about 6 school staff ranging from teacher that states she just needs herbs and doens't have BiPolar (BP), to the school pyschologist who is more fascinated by his pocket protector than anything else, he just stares at it all the time when he isnt' fidgeting in his seat scary!

    So, i let everyone get comfy sign the sign in sheet put the tape recorder on and introduce themselves, than the head chairperson said ok mrs. blah blah how's difficult child doing in class?? that's when i said can i interject for a moment please??

    I said unfortunately i'm giong to have to table this meeting today, i was not provided the documents i requested in writing on such and such date. i gave them dates of phone calls made, chasing down anyone to respond to me. The chairperson just sat and shook her head.

    They were stunned and totally surprised. Guess they dont' get alot of that! They said your actually giong to table the meeting? I said yes I never enter into any meeting with-o being prepared and right now i am not due to the school not providing me with x, y and z. I said i appreciate everyone being here i wish they had forfilled my request in a timely manner. I look forward to working with all of you again hopefully soon. Yup I was as sweet as pie just to upset them. :)

    Chairperson who used to be last year school pyschologist threw me a dig and said hopefully your ex can be at the next meeting. They know he is against me as far as difficult child's diagnosis so they'd really want him lol. I said sheesh one can only hope yet his job is very demanding so i update him accordingly.

    I get home nad i get a missed call from school. Guess what suddenly they have all the doctor's they couldn't provide me with and want to reconvene at 2:15 today. Nope. i'm letting them wait out my return phone call.

    I'm in battle mode now. Let them wait. They really just dont' get how fiercely i will fight them for difficult child. Maybe after this morning they now have a little taste........

    one can only hope. they just seemed so shocked that I knew I could table the meeting like that. They were all sort of sitting there with-their mouths hanging open. Once I get the nurses' log's which they claim are hand written. That won't work I need copies of actual log's, i do not trust them i'm going to draw a timeline on oaktag, and do a whole presentation if need be.
  2. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    I think I heard your roar all the way over in these parts!

    That is so awesome! I wish I could have been in that room with a video camera.
    We'll even though you did a good job kicking butt, let's hope they get it together so you will not have to kick any more!

    Oh, by the way: HERBS??? Is that really their place to suggest this! I also think you should wear a pocket protector next time. LOL
  3. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member


  4. Jena

    Jena New Member

    Toto - Im telling you, this guy sits there fidgeting, playing with-his pocket protector, it takes "effort" not to laugh. strong mental effort. :)

    I should wear one next time. Oh, thier going to fight me bigtime. They expected to see the woman they saw last year who was teary eyed and devastated by the diagnosis, nope not me anymore. thank goodness. They want a battle they soo have one on their hands. Plus, a parent member from board has been doing a great job clueing me into these little things that help greatly!

    I'm calling NAMI and asking them if they can send me books on BiPolar (BP), written by papollos so i can distribut them at the next mtg. i'm giong to tell them they need some pyscho education as to the workings of BiPolar (BP) in kids. than i'm giong to draw a timeline based off the nurses' logs that have miraculously appeared. When I"m done the parent member siad let them know you wont' give up. I'm going to state that if they find that difficult child isnt' eligible i will continue to appeal, go into arbitration if necessary. She said that will get them knowing you wont' go away.

    Roar isnt' even the word, i felt like a horse in the gate. I guess all my pent up aggrivation as of late was channeled properly for a change lol.

    yes at beginning of school year ms. herbal suggested i give difficult child herbs, adn that there is no way that kid has BiPolar (BP) in her own wording, while by the way she was giving out info on another kid in class HIPA violation right there.
  5. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    Hey, our Nuero-psychiatric gave me a great pamphlet on BiPolar (BP) and educating our kids from

    It is called "The Student with Bipolar Disorder- And educator's guide"
    It is a small booklet and is wonderfully written. I am not sure if they cost much or are free.
    She gave me a couple to hand out.
    They are very well done.
  6. jbrain

    jbrain Member

    I am so tickled with your update! You handled that beautifully--and I love that you were sweet as pie! You made my day!!
  7. Jena

    Jena New Member

    toto thanks for the link i appreciate it. NAMI and a few other resources are so great and nice, they have sent me hard cover books for free at times.

    School just called again after I returned saying sorry i have another obligation and they were soo soo sweet. The chairperson called and said I have your logs here, if you would like to pick them up. I will send you a letter with-a new date.

    soo weird they are and totally unprepared.

    Jane - thanks. we'll see part 1 of probably a 10 part series lol.

    Thing is they know i know their going to fight me now. It's so crazy what i have to go through just to get difficult child set up the right way, isn't it?? yet i keep thinking of all those other kids who will come through this district or possibly have that didnt' get services or will be challenged to get them. I will never give up till i get what i want, i also have my Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) to thank for that. :) sometimes diagnosis's can be beneficial
  8. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Ya know what? I think this is awesome. Jena, was that the rumble I heard this morning as I was driving to work after my doctor appointment?


    You've helped me here. Inspired me. because I am not going to let difficult children's schools get away with this carp any more...

    Last year difficult child 2's teacher agreed with BM that difficult child 2 should be medicated. husband and I knew better, he was a BRAT on the medications. Actually I don't have words for how awful it was. Anyway, we went to several IEP meetings and didn't get much of anything besides Occupational Therapist (OT).

    Spent the summer digging. Went back in better prepared this year... To a teacher who is not afraid of BM and only pro medications if they're needed. We still have to work a bit, their sped person for this grade isn't the greatest (who ever heard of "one-on-one Occupational Therapist (OT)" in the classroom with the other kids?), but at least they're listening. Also, the principal who told us there was nothing he could do about BM coming in and drugging difficult child 2 moved to a different building in December. So we got a break there.

    Now that I have you guys, and more info, consequently so does husband. Explosive Child, neuropsychologist, people to vent to. WHO GET IT.

    difficult child 1 is just now getting started on her IEP. So hers will be put together a lot better.
  9. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not


    Good for you! It's so hard to something that that face to face....I probably would have chickened out!

  10. Jena

    Jena New Member

    Step - oh great i'm glad that I did! good for you. Until I found this site over a year ago now i was lost in diagnosis's with no comprehension of what it truly meant long term, since being here my eyes have opened, experiences shared. My knowledge has grown two fold and it has opened my mind to gather more info. I'm glad that you went in better prepared. Good for you!

    Daisy - i have to say the experience that I've been able to gain at my job enabled me to be able to handle that the way I did, that and alot of fury for the way they are.
  11. jannie

    jannie trying to survive....

    Good for you !! It sounds like you will be very prepared.....I can't imagine their faces...and as it gets towards the end of the year, the schedule get quite full.
  12. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Congratulations. It absolutely sounds like you had all the components down pat plus yourself appropriately psyched. There are so many things that are intimidating for parents. Parents assume (not!) that the school knows best.
    Parents are outnumbered. Parents don't have decades of experience. It is
    hard. BUT once you realize that you do know alot about the problems and
    certainly the most about your child....it can give you confidence to walk in with your head high and the "reasonable expectation of cooperation".

    Your post will inspire others. By word of mouth you will inspire others. The
    best part of your presentation is that you did not get emotional, you did not
    get defensive, you were not argumentative, you kept your voice on an even plane. Those things are huge. Great job. I'm proud. DDD
  13. Jena

    Jena New Member

    you guys are so kind, it sometimes shocks me honestly lol. today was just the first day of it all. hopefully i'll be able to keep my calm once the fight truly begins. their mailing me a letter informing me of other date. i did get the nurse logs' now i have to go after the interior guts of her file, the psychiatric part of it. wow difficult child has been to the nurse alot! yet serious decrease i gotta admit once seroquel kicked in.
  14. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Wish I could have been a fly on the wall. You rock warrior mom!
  15. Jena

    Jena New Member

    thanks sharon warrior mom will be rocking on the 15th, they already mailed out the new date. wow it was worded differently stating i can bring whomever id' like to the meeting therapists, docs etc.

  16. nvts

    nvts Active Member

    and have some leaves and an herbal tea bag pinned to it! :rofl::rofl:

    Way to go!

  17. Jena

    Jena New Member

    Maybe I will wear pocket protector and bring herbal tea for all???? Am I reaching.......... :) LOL
  18. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Jen, You are AWESOME!!!!!

    I am SOOO not surprised they already mailed you the notice of a new meeting date. Or that they tried to give you the info and have you meet with them the same day. That is a trick our middle school tried to pull. AFTER they introduced me to the TWELVE people in the meeting!!! (2 of whom admitted they didn't know my child or anything about IEPs!, ROFL!!)

    Please be aware that if a teacher or other school employee says your child had to have medications to come to school then the SCHOOL must PAY for the medications. And they can NOT use your insurance company!!!

    Here if a teacher even SUGGESTS medication they get a reprimand. They can suggest evaluation, but NOT anything specific. Even saying herbs will help can, in some areas, make the school responsible for footing the bill. A lot of it depends on how they word it, but if it is a condition of attending school then the school must pay for it and the doctor visits.

    I think you are doing a great job. Be SuRE you have pics of difficult child on the presentation - often in meetings they seem to forget it is a child, or worse yet which child. I found putting a small photo of difficult child on the pages to be invaluable. It brought the focus off the school and its budget and other problems and kept it on my child.
  19. daralex

    daralex Clinging onto my sanity

    That was way too cool!! Wanna come to my next CSE?!!
  20. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    Good Job!

    I would have pretended I never made it home to get the message and showed up after school to pick up the documents. I like your style.

    You should distribute the NAMI pamphlets and the info Totoro provided BEFORE the next meeting and let them know that you will be taking questions of the info in the flier at the meeting.