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Parent Emeritus
I made him leave.
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<blockquote data-quote="Albatross" data-source="post: 677561" data-attributes="member: 17720"><p>You told him no and he showed up anyway, and acted *as if*. As if everything is normal, as if the only reasonable thing would be for you to let him stay.</p><p></p><p>That is the reasonable thing, if you don't live in the rabbit hole. The reasonable thing is that our children need our help, they ask if we can provide it, and we provide it. They accept it in the spirit it is given, and then they move forward.</p><p></p><p>But that's not how it goes when our Difficult Child's show up.</p><p></p><p>I forget that sometimes, that my home, my sanctuary, becomes the rabbit hole when he's in it. I start doubting myself, doubting what I know to be true, doubting what I know is the right thing to do.</p><p></p><p>I see what M means. I agree with what he said about my house, my rules. About how nice it would be to have logic and limits guide our decisions.</p><p></p><p>I crave that kind of objectivity, but in the real world it is not so easy to maintain, I think. I know it isn't for me. I am glad that you have M watching out for you, for trying to help you find that objectivity.</p><p></p><p>I think you did the right thing, Copa. I'm sorry it was so hard and so exhausting for you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Albatross, post: 677561, member: 17720"] You told him no and he showed up anyway, and acted *as if*. As if everything is normal, as if the only reasonable thing would be for you to let him stay. That is the reasonable thing, if you don't live in the rabbit hole. The reasonable thing is that our children need our help, they ask if we can provide it, and we provide it. They accept it in the spirit it is given, and then they move forward. But that's not how it goes when our Difficult Child's show up. I forget that sometimes, that my home, my sanctuary, becomes the rabbit hole when he's in it. I start doubting myself, doubting what I know to be true, doubting what I know is the right thing to do. I see what M means. I agree with what he said about my house, my rules. About how nice it would be to have logic and limits guide our decisions. I crave that kind of objectivity, but in the real world it is not so easy to maintain, I think. I know it isn't for me. I am glad that you have M watching out for you, for trying to help you find that objectivity. I think you did the right thing, Copa. I'm sorry it was so hard and so exhausting for you. [/QUOTE]
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