meowbunny
New Member
Or m for being so stupid. On the advice of a car dealership and confirmation from someone at a credit union, I agreed to put $1,000 in an account in my child's name for two months. At the end of the two months, they would give her a letter of credit and loan to get a car. Obviously, my name could not be on the account -- it had to be hers.
I explained that she could not touch this money for any reason. 1. It was mine. 2. If she spent it she pretty much guaranteed I would be homeless when this lease was up. 3. She needed to add to it so that she looked financially responsible.
So, I checked the account on the 5th. Yup, she did it. She took money out. I left her a message to give me a call. She called at midnight. I said I needed to see her on the following day (Monday). "Why?" "Why do you think?" "I don't know, just tell me." I did.
The reasons why she took the money were incredible. It wasn't stealing because she was going to pay it back. If she had asked me, I would have said no. They had the money for the rent but the bank was closed when she got off work and she couldn't get the money. I was going to give her some money anyway so what difference did it make?
Let's see, you couldn't just deposit your paycheck and write a check for the rent? I didn't think of that and the ATM doesn't take deposits. How did you manage to get the money out of the credit union if the bank was closed. No answer. No matter what, it was my money, dear child. You had no right to take it without permission.
Yesterday, I get a call from her bank (I have her phone) informing me that she is seriously overdrawn and the check fees are getting too high. If she doesn't do something, they will press charges.
I am drafting an IOU for her. In it, she will admit to owing me the money and admit to the theft of those funds. If she doesn't pay the money she took (I made her get the remaining funds in the credit union and give them to me) by the end of the month, I am pressing charges for theft and conversion of funds.
To put it mildly, I am heartsick. The idea of being homeless is not my idea of fun but without that $1K, I won't have the deposits I need to get a new place plus have money to make the move. The idea of my beloved daughter in jail is enough to make me want to slit my wrists. I don't want to do it but I will. She needs to learn she cannot keep doing things like this. She is now an adult living on her own.
I've been in shock all week, barely functioning, scared to death for both of us. I love this kid. I really, truly do but I hate what she becomes when she starts hanging with others. The same cycle over and over and over. This time I can't bail her out even if I wanted to. She's taken everything out of me -- I'm left with an overwhelming pain and that's about it.
I explained that she could not touch this money for any reason. 1. It was mine. 2. If she spent it she pretty much guaranteed I would be homeless when this lease was up. 3. She needed to add to it so that she looked financially responsible.
So, I checked the account on the 5th. Yup, she did it. She took money out. I left her a message to give me a call. She called at midnight. I said I needed to see her on the following day (Monday). "Why?" "Why do you think?" "I don't know, just tell me." I did.
The reasons why she took the money were incredible. It wasn't stealing because she was going to pay it back. If she had asked me, I would have said no. They had the money for the rent but the bank was closed when she got off work and she couldn't get the money. I was going to give her some money anyway so what difference did it make?
Let's see, you couldn't just deposit your paycheck and write a check for the rent? I didn't think of that and the ATM doesn't take deposits. How did you manage to get the money out of the credit union if the bank was closed. No answer. No matter what, it was my money, dear child. You had no right to take it without permission.
Yesterday, I get a call from her bank (I have her phone) informing me that she is seriously overdrawn and the check fees are getting too high. If she doesn't do something, they will press charges.
I am drafting an IOU for her. In it, she will admit to owing me the money and admit to the theft of those funds. If she doesn't pay the money she took (I made her get the remaining funds in the credit union and give them to me) by the end of the month, I am pressing charges for theft and conversion of funds.
To put it mildly, I am heartsick. The idea of being homeless is not my idea of fun but without that $1K, I won't have the deposits I need to get a new place plus have money to make the move. The idea of my beloved daughter in jail is enough to make me want to slit my wrists. I don't want to do it but I will. She needs to learn she cannot keep doing things like this. She is now an adult living on her own.
I've been in shock all week, barely functioning, scared to death for both of us. I love this kid. I really, truly do but I hate what she becomes when she starts hanging with others. The same cycle over and over and over. This time I can't bail her out even if I wanted to. She's taken everything out of me -- I'm left with an overwhelming pain and that's about it.
