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Failure to Thrive
I need some advice
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<blockquote data-quote="Waitingforamiracle" data-source="post: 760950" data-attributes="member: 25449"><p><strong>Jay Pee said</strong><em>: " Sorry to hear that nothing has changed. I agree with Busy. No good will come from letting him come back home. You will have "maybe" a day or a few hours of feeling comfort in knowing he has a place to rest his head and food in his belly and that you know where he is. But I promise you it will get ugly...they get verbally abusive and angry and all bets are off. You will feel like a prisoner in your home."</em></p><p>This (apart from the addiction) is the situation we have had twice with our son in the last 3 years. If they have Borderline or NPD the behaviours are the same, I dread to think what addiction on top of this would be like!</p><p>Please continue to reach out for support here. You need to be strong, I know how hard it is to hold out against the FOG - fear, obligation and guilt and give in. It's against everything we are taught by stories and family narratives. But you need to have safety and peace, and if your son isn't willing to fight, you must show you are stronger than him. I am determined to fight and stand up for myself even though I have always been known as a softy and a pushover to all who know me. My mother was a strong woman, and fought all her life to overcome war, refugee status, four kids, divorce, mental breakdown, you name it, with no family support. I'm going to remember her and fight back for my and my husband's health (he has a blood disorder which may become cancer and is made worse by stress) and my son's mental health too. Prayers to all xx<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/notalone.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":notalone:" title="notalone :notalone:" data-shortname=":notalone:" /><img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/staystrong.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":staystrong:" title="staystrong :staystrong:" data-shortname=":staystrong:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Waitingforamiracle, post: 760950, member: 25449"] [B]Jay Pee said[/B][I]: " Sorry to hear that nothing has changed. I agree with Busy. No good will come from letting him come back home. You will have "maybe" a day or a few hours of feeling comfort in knowing he has a place to rest his head and food in his belly and that you know where he is. But I promise you it will get ugly...they get verbally abusive and angry and all bets are off. You will feel like a prisoner in your home."[/I] This (apart from the addiction) is the situation we have had twice with our son in the last 3 years. If they have Borderline or NPD the behaviours are the same, I dread to think what addiction on top of this would be like! Please continue to reach out for support here. You need to be strong, I know how hard it is to hold out against the FOG - fear, obligation and guilt and give in. It's against everything we are taught by stories and family narratives. But you need to have safety and peace, and if your son isn't willing to fight, you must show you are stronger than him. I am determined to fight and stand up for myself even though I have always been known as a softy and a pushover to all who know me. My mother was a strong woman, and fought all her life to overcome war, refugee status, four kids, divorce, mental breakdown, you name it, with no family support. I'm going to remember her and fight back for my and my husband's health (he has a blood disorder which may become cancer and is made worse by stress) and my son's mental health too. Prayers to all xx:notalone::staystrong: [/QUOTE]
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