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<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 64781" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>I hate ages 18-20+. They're legally adults but emotionally so very, very young. For mine, it took "living" on her own to get her to see that I wasn't trying to control her but to help her. Of course, this was her third attempt since she was 18 to live elsewhere. Each time turned into a total disaster with her "friends" booting her out within 2 months. Each time she lost her job for not showing up. Each of these jobs were ones she had had for 6-12 months when living at home. Like you, I wouldn't let her quit one without discussing it and having a truly valid reason for quiting.</p><p></p><p>If I had told she had to stay until she could leave the "normal way," I would have been lucky if she didn't take off 5 minutes after I said it. Now, she is trying to do it the normal way -- getting her GED, learning a skill, finding a job when we move that has a chance for promotions.</p><p></p><p>As to how an ODD child thinks, I think it varies with each child and each situation. Some will be ODD with any authority figure, even the police. Some only with those they trust to still care for them and those that can give them something. </p><p></p><p>Mine will not argue with a supervisor. In public situations, she is more passive-aggressive. At home, she is aggressive and only passive-aggressive when aggressive doesn't work and she thinks she can get away with the P/A behavior.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 64781, member: 3626"] I hate ages 18-20+. They're legally adults but emotionally so very, very young. For mine, it took "living" on her own to get her to see that I wasn't trying to control her but to help her. Of course, this was her third attempt since she was 18 to live elsewhere. Each time turned into a total disaster with her "friends" booting her out within 2 months. Each time she lost her job for not showing up. Each of these jobs were ones she had had for 6-12 months when living at home. Like you, I wouldn't let her quit one without discussing it and having a truly valid reason for quiting. If I had told she had to stay until she could leave the "normal way," I would have been lucky if she didn't take off 5 minutes after I said it. Now, she is trying to do it the normal way -- getting her GED, learning a skill, finding a job when we move that has a chance for promotions. As to how an ODD child thinks, I think it varies with each child and each situation. Some will be ODD with any authority figure, even the police. Some only with those they trust to still care for them and those that can give them something. Mine will not argue with a supervisor. In public situations, she is more passive-aggressive. At home, she is aggressive and only passive-aggressive when aggressive doesn't work and she thinks she can get away with the P/A behavior. [/QUOTE]
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