Copa, I am so happy that he called! And he sounds ready to have some real conversations about the path forward. What wonderful, wonderful news. I think M means well and his intentions are to protect you. I have conflict with R sometimes over my kids. It is hard with a partner who came into the picture when they are already adults. They can’t understand all the history and the nuances of the relationship- words aren’t adequate to describe, especially with kids as complicated as ours. And they don’t have the loving memories of them as sweet young children. Sometimes that outside perspective is valuable, helping us see things we have been to close to acknowledge. But sometimes they miss the mark, or get so protective of us they don’t see fully where we are coming from. I’m glad he has backed down. I would hate to see this drive a wedge between you, or have you in a situation where you feel like you have to choose between them. I think it’s natural for kids of any age to feel some jealousy or unease when we establish new relationships. It’s good that M and J have had a good relationship in the past. There is something there to build on. I also see the possibility of a real turning point here. I hope and pray it is. I will be anxious to hear how the meeting goes next week! And I would LOVE to have coffee with both of you, my friends! I cannot begin to tell you how much it has meant to me to find other parents who understand what it is like to deal with these issues. Hugs to you both.