I really dont get it...?

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by lovelyboy, Aug 4, 2012.

  1. lovelyboy

    lovelyboy Member

    Sorry...I know this is such a boring topic, but does any one have insight into my difficult child behaviour!!!?

    This morning he woke up....very early...Played with his hamster...came into our room, playing with his yo-yo....He seemed content, but I did wonder what's up with him, waking so early?

    He got into bed with me and asked to play some games with me on my iPad....So we did.

    I went downstairs and heard him asking his dad to play on the computer with him...hisdad didnt immediatly want to play what difficult child wanted...He suddenly got tearfull, crying, inappropriate labile emotions.

    Then he got annoying, upset, shouting, emotions all over the show! Blocking the way, not wanting me to pass to go upstairs....Then crying...No reasoning possible....reacting with total irrational unlogical words...I gave up....Just did my things and basickly ignored him a bit....

    Later he calmed down, playing and doing trics with his yo-yo....had breakfast and went shopping with me...He did tell me he slept badly, felt a bid sad when he woke up.....But he stayed very irritable the whole day....

    I dont get this....how can one person behaves like 2 totally different people within a hour!?
    My husband said it might be because he was bored and didnt have something planned for the day?
  2. EStephens

    EStephens New Member

    Sorry to hear about a hard day!
    If anyone figures out exactly how or why our difficult child's think and act they way they do, I believe we would all finally have answers we can't seem to find.
    Do you think your kiddo was upset because anything he wanted to do was not exactly what everyone else wanted to do?
    For what it's worth, my difficult child LOVES his games. I am coming to terms with the fact that my son is a gamer. (I am game stupid so I am always out of the loop as he tries to tell me about Zelda, Link, Sonic, Waluigi, Wario, and all the different characters from his games. He can talk about the characters and their adventures for hours and hours, but ask him about how he feels and you can hear crickets.) When it is game time around our house and no one really wants to play his games, he shuts down and tries to explain to us how fun the games are. It seems for him the games are more cherished than people. They seem to be like a safe zone. He has told me before that he prefers games to talking to people because people have rules that are confusing and games don't. He never has to guess what he is supposed to do in a game.

    Hope you have a better day!
  3. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Maybe there's an underlying mood disorder? He's so young, you may not know for many years.
    However, with both Asperger's and bipolar, for example, consistent sleep is of paramount importance.
    We've been giving our son something for sleep for a long time ... antihistamines when he was younger, and other medications now that he's older,and they don't always work. It makes a huge difference.
    If you ever doubt it, just send your son to an overnight at someone's house and see how many days it takes him to get back to center ...
    I hope you all can work out a coping plan for times like this, because I suspect it's not the last. Things like listening to music, going for a walk, maybe running or a sport to tire him out ... just some ideas.
    Best of luck!
  4. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    There's an interesting thing about most difficult child-type people.
    On one hand, they really need lots of structure and routine.
    On the other hand... they consciously or unconsciously fight against it.

    Getting up early - that alone used to be enough to throw my difficult child's day out the window. Not quite so bad now that he is older, but it still has an effect.
  5. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    My first thought was that he had a nightmare.....one where he was separated from you.

    He sought comfort in spending time with his per, then you and then dad. When dad rejected the video games, difficult child felt that dad was rejecting his need for connection.

    He likely struggled with that +lingering effects of the nightmare + lack if sleep
  6. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Good examples, JJJ. (So sorry they had to go through that.)
  7. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    P.S. Lovelyboy, I typed that part in about the mood disorder and then realized we had already discussed it in another thread. Sorry I'm so forgetful!
  8. lovelyboy

    lovelyboy Member

    No Terry....you are right! It does trigger that thought....doesnt it!?
  9. Ktllc

    Ktllc New Member

    How about, maybe, extreme immaturity and lack of ways to express his feelings? A bit like a 2 or 3 year old laughing one minute when things go his way and crying the next because someone said no?
  10. lovelyboy

    lovelyboy Member

    Ktllc.....Yes....it really sometimes seems as immaturity!!!!sometimes he will out of the blue, pull his mouth like a 2 or3 yr old and start sobbing!!!!!It's just so difficult coming from a VERY clever boy, who at times can act like an adult!!!!!
  11. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    I believe there is a mood component for those children on the spectrum. One of the only things I would have done different would be start mood stabilizers earlier. It may have helped save him some of the volatility as an adolescent.
  12. lovelyboy

    lovelyboy Member

    Fran.....I have this gut feeling the psychiatrist is going to put abilify(?) in the mix....She wanted to do this in the beginning of the year allready....But I didnt want to.....
  13. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Ktllc, yes, we have to remember that most of our kids are waaaay behind emotionally. Lovelyboy, my husband and I just assume that our difficult child is 4 yrs behind in some areas of maturity, so instead of being 15, he's 10. Maybe if you remind yourself that in many ways, your son is emotionally behind, and that he's actually a 5-yr-old in a 9-yr-old's body, it will help to understand.

    Nice to see you, Fran!

    Good luck with-the Abilify, Lovelyboy. It didn't do anything for us. I mean, it didn't even have many side effects. It was like water. But we just keep trying ... :)