I really feel like I'm losing my mind...

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by KTMom91, Jan 17, 2011.

  1. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    I had nearly an entire post typed...and it disappeared somewhere. I feel like my life is so out of control, I don't even know where to begin. Hubby's unemployment extension was denied, he finishes school next Monday, my arthritis is flaring up and it hurts to walk, or get up, or sit down. I can't hold on to things with the carpal tunnel flaring. I can't find things that I know should be where I put them, from a box of mac-n-cheese to my diamond bracelet. I can't remember things, from whether or not I watched a certain Wipeout to when my next dr appointment is...and I've missed one that I had no recollection of even having.

    I'm so overwhelmed with the mess in this house, combined with the furniture moving, that I don't know what to do first. I feel helpless because my hands don't work, my body doesn't work...I can't even put a sock on my left foot without help, because I have limited movement in my hip. I work for two days and sleep for three, and I'm afraid that all the sorting and moving we've done today will come back to bite me tomorrow.

    I feel stupid, helpless, frustrated, useless...
  2. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    Hang in there hon, feeling isn't being. *hugs*
  3. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    You "sound" depressed. :( And for a lot of good reasons. {{{Hugs}}}
  4. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I am so sorry. Have you filed for whatever help you are eligible for - food stamps, etc... With unemployemnt denied you need to update that info and it shoudl increase your benefits.

    I compeltely understand how you feel. I am so sorry as I wouldn't wish this on anyone in the world, esp not one of my friends. I hope that you can get this flare under control, even if it means applying for disability or going to a free clinic to see if the doctors can help you. If you have a doctor and know of medications that might help, ask the doctor to help you with the patient assistatnce programs.

    In the meantime, ((((((((((((((((((((gentle hugs))))))))))))))))))))
  5. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    Mary, many gentle ((((hugs)))). Please, listen to your body & for goodness sake start giving yourself a break. I posted in another thread that only we will talk to ourselves the way you are talking to yourself right now. We wouldn't be that rude or insensitive to another being so why are you doing it to yourself?

    We're here to listen ~ vent, scream & cry. Please don't put yourself down.
  6. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful


    I ditto susie in telling you to apply for everything possible, all they can do is tell you no.

    We've waited 5 plus wks for unemployment to tell us there was a glitch in the program that had held up husband's claim. We got our first check last week.......and are still waiting on the back pay so we can make house payments....not to mention pay all the other bills. Thanks to my Mom we're not starving. Thanks to my kids, my furbabies aren't starving either.

    We've been hanging on by our nails so long if that money doesn't show up within the next day or two..........well, I refuse to think about it because there is nothing I can do about it. Some things in this world we just don't have control over.

    But if the state don't get it's fanny in gear quick we may be joining katie and family in the homeless shelter... ugh

    Praying for you, my friend. Try to let go of the things you can do nothing about, it does help. Hang in there.
  7. Jena

    Jena New Member


    you def arent' losing it and it's ok to be overwhelmed. trust me im the expert lol. you do need to slow down take care of you yet at this point may sound like craziness to you. yet pushing yourself isnt' going to fix anything right now at all it'll just make matters worse for you and pain sucks let's face it.

    as far as the rest goes i wish i could give some awesome advice yet you know your state better how it works and what benefits you can get at this point to help you sail thru this ridiculously rough patch your going thru.

    vent and scream away your just in a funk and it's understandable and you will climb out of it.

  8. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Mary, I think CA is one of the few states that have a state disability program. Apply for it. Also apply for FS while you are able just to see what you are eligible for. Cant hurt to ask.

    I know what you are going through with the pain. I have no idea what kind of doctor you go to so Im just gonna toss things out there. If you can get your doctor to rx them, methadone has been a great drug for me and its cheap. Very cheap. Im also on a very low dose and it doesnt make me sleepy much at all. First week or two was a bit of a struggle but now Im fine. Also, my wonder drug for joint issues is ketoprofen. I like it better than any of the other anti-inflammatory drugs. (Your laugh for the day...Cory calls this class of drugs exflammatory drugs...lol) Im not sure how much they run but maybe they have a drug program. For me, they are like advil on steroids. I only take one or two a day but they really do help keep the ouchy joints at bay.

    Getting up or sitting down? Hahaha. You should see me trying to get up out of a sitting position. I need a crane! I get stuck in the bathtub and its not a pretty picture. Like getting a beached whale out. My bathtub isnt quite as bad since it is a garden tub and I can somewhat turn sideways and get a grip but in a smaller hotel tub, omg, its horrible. Tony has to attempt to grab me while Im slippery and its just not good.

    Wish I could find my old walker...I would ship it to you. If I can, I will. I dont use it anymore because I found that it doesnt work for me. I need the one for larger people because my butt is too big for the seat on this one. Plus, I just dont get the concept. Maybe Im just not using it right or something. I use my wheelchair more. Have seat will travel!

    If I can get my family out of my house, I am gonna get it cleaned and fixed up then Im applying for a hoverround. I think that would help me more. I would give my left arm...have to have my right to do anything...to be able to be in front of the sink or stove for more than 5 or 10 minutes at a time to cook or wash dishes. Every day housework is a pita. Isnt it horrible when people think we are lazy because everything looks a mess but its because we simply cant bend over to actually do anything? Ugh.

    Oh...if you have any Salvation Army stores or Goodwill or even church thrift stores, you may be able to pick up handicapped items there. Ask if they have any in the back for handicapped people. Sometimes they keep them in the back to help folks out and give them to them. I actually got my mom a hospital bed that way when she came to live with me and her medicare wouldnt pay for one. She didnt have medicaid. Also look for aids to put on your socks, arthritis eating utensils, grips to open jars...all kinds of things. Check online for stuff like that and you would be amazed at what they have...so you know what to look for at these places. Im going to be getting me some of this stuff when I get some money. If you look in a thrift store you might find one of those handicapped potty chairs...those are amazing for leaning on to get up and down from beds and chairs and also the toilet and tub. They are very sturdy. I have mine next to my bed.
  9. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    I've had ketoprofen and I adore it. Did wonders for migraines for me. I don't recall it being very expensive, either. Too bad you can't still buy it OTC.
  10. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    Sending supportive thoughts and hugs your way. DDD
  11. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    H...I know, I wish they still had it OTC. Have no clue why they took it off the market. They still keep pushing that evil tylenol but take good stuff away...lol. I hate tylenol...might as just drink the glass of water for all the good it does me plus it can kill you.
  12. Jody

    Jody Active Member

    I hope you feel better soon. Hugs and Prayers coming your way.
  13. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Hugs, sweetie... I get flaky when I get stressed out too.

    And I third that wish we could still get ketoprofen OTC - 12mg killed off an abscessed-tooth-ache-from-Hades. Now 1000 mg of ibuprofen or acetominophen and ... NOTHING...
  14. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Steph...you should feel the bliss of 50 mg twice a day!
  15. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    *builds her own "Like" button and presses it repeatedly*
  16. barneysmom

    barneysmom Member

    Overwhelm is the pits. I experience it fairly regularly. It's good that you could list all the contributing factors and see that you have good reasons to be overwhelmed. Hope everything on your list falls into place for you soon.

  17. KTMom91

    KTMom91 Well-Known Member

    Thanks, ladies.

    Heard from the teacher I subbed for last week, when the kids were wild and Miss KT got lost. She wants me to sub for her on Friday, but then told me that the custodian said the room was a mess (NOT TRUE, I never leave a mess...NEVER) and the aides had been talking about how wild the kids were, and she didn't want me to be taken off the list for that school, because she knows how good I am, but anyway, the aides tell the principal everything...So I reminded her that, again, she had not left detailed plans, and when I got there at lunch, she'd left a half cup of tea on the table, and there were centers in progress, but left me no info on how much longer the centers were to be run, and I know perfectly well I left no mess. Then she tells me the kids didn't get lunch recess that day, because they were in trouble. No wonder they were squirrely! They're FIVE! So I'm miffed about that, but still...I've subbed for her for seven years, and I am creative, so I'll figure it out.

    And Hubby got an unemployment check today; guess they decided to reinstate. He decided to deposit it in the ATM, and I asked him to drop off a check for our homeowner's insurance, since the insurance office is about three blocks from the bank (it's a small town). He refused, first because he didn't know the exact amount. I knew how much was past due, just get something in there. Then he refused because he didn't have the account number. It's right here. He kept whining about going three extra blocks, till I finally yelled, "Fine! I'll do it!" And when he gets home? He has no idea why I'm ticked. And I am way ticked. I'm working tomorrow, and the insurance office is NOT on my way.
  18. flutterby

    flutterby Fly away!

    When you have pain, it increases your fatigue; fatigue decreases your cognitive function (so does pain, too, by the way). Add stress to the mix and you're functioning brain dead.

    Like Linda said, listen to your body.

  19. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Nothing more to add :( (((((Hugs)))))
  20. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    Next time husband can't go an extra 3 blocks...................tell him FINE! Then when the house burns to the ground and there is no insurance to cover the cost of the rebuild, just remind yourself YOU couldn't be bothered to drive 3 blocks! And I wouldn't do it for him.

    Seriously, you need to be able to delegate to reduce some stress levels. He needs to take on what you need to delegate and get over it. It's not like you asked him to drive 3 hrs out of his way. sheesh Men.

    Glad unemployment changed their minds. Wonder if he encountered a similar glitch to husband's.............which they finally have all sorted out and we'll receive back payment checks tomorrow. Glory be! The house is saved. sigh

    And who the heck removes recess on 5 yr olds??? That is moronic! They need to burn off energy. Surely she can be more creative than that. lol