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I spent the morning in tears...
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<blockquote data-quote="TheWalrus" data-source="post: 677900" data-attributes="member: 19905"><p>I have learned that "confronting" her leads to one of two places: (1) she will flatly lie and deny or (2) she will blow up and I will get the "laundry list" of how everything in her life is my fault. She will then hoard every word I say to later use against me in some way. </p><p></p><p>These people want to talk to me but that puts me in such an awkward, awkward position. I have no desire to divulge her problems to the world (that is why I come here anonymously). We live in a small town and I want her to have an opportunity to someday regain her life and her reputation. I know SHE may forever throw that away with her actions, but I don't want to be the one to take that from her by discussing all she has done, her mental conditions, her choices that led her where she is. If she throws away opportunities, that is one thing. I cannot and will not be the one to take those away from her.</p><p></p><p>To be honest it would be a horrid mistake for these people to let her in, but I don't know how to let them know that without divulging private things about her that I feel are not my place to discuss or leaving her with nowhere to go. Even though she is more than willing to hurt me, I still cannot do or say anything that I feel could hurt her or hurt her future.</p><p></p><p>And because it is such a small town, it does affect me. I have a reputation that I have tried staunchly to protect, regardless of whether she cares about hers. That is how I found out...</p><p></p><p>I have no idea what to do, what to say, when these people call and want to talk to me about her and this situation. I need help with how to handle this in a way that maintains my love for her, as well as is honest but protects her privacy. Oh, the crap she drags me into!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TheWalrus, post: 677900, member: 19905"] I have learned that "confronting" her leads to one of two places: (1) she will flatly lie and deny or (2) she will blow up and I will get the "laundry list" of how everything in her life is my fault. She will then hoard every word I say to later use against me in some way. These people want to talk to me but that puts me in such an awkward, awkward position. I have no desire to divulge her problems to the world (that is why I come here anonymously). We live in a small town and I want her to have an opportunity to someday regain her life and her reputation. I know SHE may forever throw that away with her actions, but I don't want to be the one to take that from her by discussing all she has done, her mental conditions, her choices that led her where she is. If she throws away opportunities, that is one thing. I cannot and will not be the one to take those away from her. To be honest it would be a horrid mistake for these people to let her in, but I don't know how to let them know that without divulging private things about her that I feel are not my place to discuss or leaving her with nowhere to go. Even though she is more than willing to hurt me, I still cannot do or say anything that I feel could hurt her or hurt her future. And because it is such a small town, it does affect me. I have a reputation that I have tried staunchly to protect, regardless of whether she cares about hers. That is how I found out... I have no idea what to do, what to say, when these people call and want to talk to me about her and this situation. I need help with how to handle this in a way that maintains my love for her, as well as is honest but protects her privacy. Oh, the crap she drags me into! [/QUOTE]
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