I talked to my friend ...

klmno

Active Member
husband has been dead 5 years? I must have overlooked that part before- I was thinking maybe 1-2 year. Then, if she wasn't dating or socializing before now, it sounds like this is more a reaction to her youngest becoming a teen and she decided she can just go do what she wants now. in my humble opinion.
 

TerryJ2

Well-Known Member
Could be. I just think it's all pent-up and she's going off the deep end.
It's a crying shame that nobody likes this scumbag of a boyfriend. And that she leaves teen at home.
 

mom_in_training

New Member
How sad for the kids..... Very selfish woman to put a man before her kids to satisfy her own insecurities or needs. I would call CPS in a heartbeat, Do it for the youngest. She needs to be put in check. And you know the man that shes run off with is really no better then she is considering that he is just willingly going along with what is happening. Crazy and so sad.
 

WhymeMom?

No real answers to life..
Before you call CPS I was wondering what the consequences of that call would be? Would this push the fourteen year old to move to another state with mom and her boyfriend? That wouldn't be so great. Would it seperate the family ---talking about brother from brother? That wouldn't be so great. Would it mean younger two brothers would not have a home to live in since mother could sell it and be on her "merry" way? That wouldn't be so great.....

Doesn't sound like there are easy answers here.....even if she comes home now.....with or without boyfriend....she has lost the respect of her sons (and rightly so....).....Just doesn't sound so great.....
 

TerryJ2

Well-Known Member
I know she has lost the respect of her oldest son and of me.

I do think she would freak out and take the 14-yr-old somewhere else if CPS showed up.

I'm biding my time. She'll be home in less than 2 wks. I'm hoping she gets into a knock-down-drag-out with-her boyfriend b4 then. She's pretty stubborn and you never know. She broke up with-him once. She could do it again.
 

house of cards

New Member
My brother in law had this happen to him. Father died suddenly at a fairly young age and Mom took up with a neighbor and family friend. One day she told the kids she was moving out of state with her new boyfriend and that their was food in the frig for now...Bye. they both came back eventually but it is truly unbelievable. The neighborhood took over taking care of the kids as best they could then, way back in the 60's, too. She had an older son and daughter and 14 yo twins(brother in law was one). The neighborhood threw the twins a party when they joined the marines at 17 YO. Sometimes mom is just not the right word to use. Thank you for steping in to help these kids.
 

TerryJ2

Well-Known Member
Oh, so sorry. :(

We talked to a psychiatric friend, just conversationally at a breakfast mtng, and mentioned it to him. He said you get your garden variety cases, and then you get someone like this. He said he's seen a lot of this, but never one where the mom took off and left the kids in the care of the other kids, even if only for a mo. He thinks she's never properly grieved over her husband, hasn't processed it properly. Time will tell.

I still can't figure out why the boyfriend would tell C. not to see my husband as her chiro any more. She was unable to work for an entire mo, showed up in his ofc in tears, with-a bad neck, and he got her out of pain and back to work, and never charged her a penny.
And that's what he gets for thanks. I'd like to hear her explanation.
Then again, maybe not. :(
 
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