Son pulled a knife on us and then somehow cut himself a little on his leg. We called the police. I went down to meet the cops when I hear son screaming. Run back up, husband has him on the ground, husband's head is bleeding. Son had thrown a really big rock at him. Hubs tackled him. Four cops in our house. He's saying that we wouldn't feed him and that hubs cut him and always attacks him. omfg!!! Hubs would never lay a finger on him, except in self-defense, which has happened a few times. Hub's head has been busted open 3 times by son, and none of those times did he ever hit back. Police broke protocol and agreed to let us take him to a private hospital instead. But they wanted to take him to the police station first. Son was in agreement to go to the hospital instead of the state. Police know our story from many previous incidents, it's a small town. So. We get all our stuff together as fast as we can and run to the police station to get him. If I were not needed to sign the hospital papers, hubs would go without me because of how carsick I get, and it's a 4-hr drive, but he's not the bio-dad so he can't sign. We get to the police station. They're taking pictures of son's leg, and they also got one of hub's head. I had already sent a picture of my arm from an earlier aggression today, to the doctor. Son had written to the doctor saying: "if she keeps bugging me, she's going to end up with something way worse than that mark on her arm." Doctor told us that it was dangerous for us. So I guess there's that if it comes to a courtroom. We get in the car. Start the 4-hr journey. Immediately I start thinking. After about 20 minutes I ask them to stop the car and for hubs to get out to talk to me. We call my mom and ask her if son can stay with her for a while. She says yes, if he agrees to follow her rules. Son of course says yes. He is the only grandchild and my mom has always spoiled him, which is why I didn't want him living with her. But I just don't think that spending another $3000 on a week of hospitalization (yup, that's what it costs here and the alternatives are horrific), is going to make any difference at all. Hubs calls another car to pick me up and bring me back home. He and son do the rest of the journey to my mom's, without me. For now, we all assume he wouldn't do anything like this to my mom. But now I'm worried about her safety, now that I think about it some more. Today was so scary. But hopefully, he won't pull this kind of stuff on her, at least long enough for us to figure something else out. I've heard of other families where the problem child wasn't violent with other adults/guardians. Do you think it is irresponsible to let him stay with my 60+ year-old mom? I told her to let us know at the first sign of problems, but still, it makes me nervous. It's midnight. I got these terrible shakes a little while ago. Hubs will be another couple hours at least. We just talked and he said "it feels like son has won and we might never get him back". I don't know if I'm just in shock, but I'm not crying. I'm more just realizing how terrified I am of him. When you're living in a battle zone all the time, you don't realize that you're in survival mode until the battle is over and you release. And then you feel it. I'll probably cry soon. But maybe not. I miss my boy so much. I've been missing him for almost a year. I think I may have already mourned him.