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<blockquote data-quote="Dancerat" data-source="post: 626788" data-attributes="member: 14984"><p>I think a lot of people have the inner strength through practice. It's hard. My beautiful gifted son started down the wrong path after dating a heroin addict and he has changed to the point where I am at the point of asking him to leave. I mean, I have told him his last day is June 1, and I am being incredibly gracious and generous with that date. He asked me for a tent today to sleep in. Okay. Why can't they be nice and thankful? I don't know. It's obvious they aren't in a happy and good place in their lives. The only time he is nice to me is when he asks me for money, and that just ended, so he is no longer nice. I love him, he's 21, so I figure what I can and cannot live with. I can live with buying him a bus pass. He can eat here at the house, but in two weeks, he should hope to have food stamps and a place to live other than a tent because I have come to the end of my own personal rope. And that happens. Some ropes are longer than others. I just think of it, as well, time to pay some dues in life. His sisters are amazing people and didn't get half of what he has gotten, including a car, and favor after favor, and are self supporting, mature adults. Mine is like 21 going on 15. And not the honor student 15, either. </p><p></p><p>You will be okay. I'm sorry about the parked in the car deal. It's really hard when you are sitting there, thinking "where did I lose control?" and you can replay different scenarios over in your mind, but remember this. Each moment is a brand new path in your life. You can live your life the way you want to, going forward. Your partner doesn't deserve this, you don't deserve this, your son doesn't deserve this, but he is CHOOSING this, for whatever reason. I hug you from far away. Post here a lot, it really helps. I'm glad there as so many understanding souls. We get it. I can read these posts all day long and feel like I am not alone (and I do - I guess I'm a lurker). </p><p></p><p>IF you could do whatever you wanted to do, or SAY whatever you wanted to say, to your son, what would it be?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Dancerat, post: 626788, member: 14984"] I think a lot of people have the inner strength through practice. It's hard. My beautiful gifted son started down the wrong path after dating a heroin addict and he has changed to the point where I am at the point of asking him to leave. I mean, I have told him his last day is June 1, and I am being incredibly gracious and generous with that date. He asked me for a tent today to sleep in. Okay. Why can't they be nice and thankful? I don't know. It's obvious they aren't in a happy and good place in their lives. The only time he is nice to me is when he asks me for money, and that just ended, so he is no longer nice. I love him, he's 21, so I figure what I can and cannot live with. I can live with buying him a bus pass. He can eat here at the house, but in two weeks, he should hope to have food stamps and a place to live other than a tent because I have come to the end of my own personal rope. And that happens. Some ropes are longer than others. I just think of it, as well, time to pay some dues in life. His sisters are amazing people and didn't get half of what he has gotten, including a car, and favor after favor, and are self supporting, mature adults. Mine is like 21 going on 15. And not the honor student 15, either. You will be okay. I'm sorry about the parked in the car deal. It's really hard when you are sitting there, thinking "where did I lose control?" and you can replay different scenarios over in your mind, but remember this. Each moment is a brand new path in your life. You can live your life the way you want to, going forward. Your partner doesn't deserve this, you don't deserve this, your son doesn't deserve this, but he is CHOOSING this, for whatever reason. I hug you from far away. Post here a lot, it really helps. I'm glad there as so many understanding souls. We get it. I can read these posts all day long and feel like I am not alone (and I do - I guess I'm a lurker). IF you could do whatever you wanted to do, or SAY whatever you wanted to say, to your son, what would it be? [/QUOTE]
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