if it isn't difficult child it's now easy child

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by ksm, Jan 9, 2014.

  1. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    easy child had a friend over for an overnight on Saturday. We took our kids electronics for the night when it was time for bed. Her guest said her mom wanted her to have hers on in case she called her. So we told her the house rule about no texting or messaging people after bedtime. Well, easy child said the girl woke her up during the night (1am?) and said a classmate was outside our house and needed a place to stay as he ran away from abusive parents. It was bitterly cold out. So they took the screen off the bedroom window (2nd floor) and the two girls got on the roof of the first floor family room addition. He took a patio chair and climbed up and the other girl pulled him up. The next morning, the girls told difficult child what was going on, and they helped him go out the window in her closet, which has a sloped roof line that took him closer to the ground. Of course, I didn't know any of this til Tuesday night.

    Then on Sunday, easy child came to me and said that it was weird, she got a FB msg from some classmates parents that for some reason thought he was at our house and that the police might come. Of course, we had never heard anything about a missing teen by then. No police came or called. So I didn't think much of it.

    Monday night... husband parked the school bus in the back yard so he could plug it in as it was so cold. He noticed the patio chair on the wrong side of the house. Then we went upstairs and saw the foot prints on our roof. We thought we had a peeping tom incident, so he called the police. Neither child fessed up to what happened. And I guess the policeman we had wasn't aware of the missing boy, or it never came up.

    By Tuesday, I knew something was up... and put two and two together and easy child confessed to it all. Plus, the girl's mom had found text messages on her child's phone and knew about it and notified the county sheriff (they live outside of town) So husband called the police back and have them come back and talk to the girls and got the whole story from them. Also, the missing boys uncle came to our house and we let him in and showed him around and that we had contacted the police.

    Last night, the teen boys uncle and aunt came back to our house, as rumors were still circulating that he was still hiding in the girls closet. So he searched the house again.

    Last night, about 3am, husband woke up and thought he heard a noise, so he got up and checked, and the front door was unlocked. He was afraid we had someone in the house so we searched it all over again. I know I didn't lock it as I went to bed early - and he can't remember for certain that he did or didn't. We always lock it - but DS stopped by and we can't remember if we locked it up again after he left. So husband spent the rest of the night on the sofa to look out for stuff.

    Today, I get home from work and I see that someone has called us 4 times while we were working. I called the number back (no name showed up on caller ID) and it was a detective's office. The secretary took a message that I called back... so now I am just kind of worrying about what now??? We took the girls phones/tablets/ipod when we realized that they had lied about everything. So they have no way to have had any real contact with this kid. And we have been home with them except for about 30 minutes from end of school til I show up after work.

    I don't think I have slept much for the last three nights. easy child has always been my "easy" child. She normally doesn't do things like this. But, I have noticed a pattern that she only breaks the rules when her friends push her to. It is like she can't tell them no. On Sunday, she was sick and throwing up - I think from the stress of what she had done. She was sick on Monday at the school, and the school nurse even called and talked to us as she felt something was wrong. Unfortunately, the word at school is out what happened, and now the girls she usually hung around with don't want anything to do with her. She also breaks out in hives a couple times a week, and we haven't found a reason why. The doctors thinks it is nerves/stress related.

    And, she seems to be blaming herself that the teen is still missing. Plus, this kid took two movie passes from her friends wallet (easy child saw him do it) and now she feels like she has to pay her friend back for the missing movie passes! WHAT?? I tried to explain to her that she is only responsible for her decisions and actions.. The boy contacted her friend, he stole from her friend, she didn't! I just can't see why she has to take on all the guilt for this. Unfortunately, we have two more weeks til her next therapy appointment. I am going to call and see if we can get worked in, but that usually doesn't happen.
  2. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    Good news... the run away has been found and is safe. Maybe easy child will will lighten up a little. KSM
  3. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    So glad the runaway was found. So sorry easy child ended up involved and so stressed which, of course, led to much stress for you. Sending gentle hugs and hope easy child bounces back quickly.