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I'm back - and she's really done it this time!
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<blockquote data-quote="Tanya M" data-source="post: 661049" data-attributes="member: 18516"><p>Hi Weary, I see nothing wrong with the way you are feeling. I have been exactly where you are.</p><p>We don't start out wanting our children to go to jail, unfortunately we arrive at this because we have tried everything else.</p><p>I think it was very brave for you to write a letter to the D.A. You were honest and that's always best. I think by doing this you are bypassing the potential for a few more years to pass where your daughter is on probation and goes back to using drugs and stripping. You see, I too wrote letters to the D.A. on a recommendation that I should express how much potential my son had and how his dad and I would be there to help him, to support him, etc..... Well, the letters worked (did this 2 times) my son was given probation and nothing changed, it progressed to be worse.</p><p></p><p>It's very natural for parents to want to help their children but sometimes they just have to learn on their own. It's like a hot stove, you tell them "don't touch, it's hot" but they won't listen and the go over and touch it and get burned. Sometimes our kids just have to learn the hard way and we really need to let them.</p><p></p><p>As for anyone giving you heat, do your best to just let that go. There are always going to be people who will pass judgment on how we choose to deal with our D.C's. They have not walked in our shoes, they have not had the sleepless nights, they have not dealt with not knowing where your child is for days or weeks, they have not felt the fear we have, they have not seen their child in jail or high on drugs, they do not know what it's like for us so it's easy for them to think they would handle it differently.</p><p></p><p>I think you are doing a great job in dealing with all of this. Don't doubt yourself.</p><p></p><p>((HUGS)) to you...................</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tanya M, post: 661049, member: 18516"] Hi Weary, I see nothing wrong with the way you are feeling. I have been exactly where you are. We don't start out wanting our children to go to jail, unfortunately we arrive at this because we have tried everything else. I think it was very brave for you to write a letter to the D.A. You were honest and that's always best. I think by doing this you are bypassing the potential for a few more years to pass where your daughter is on probation and goes back to using drugs and stripping. You see, I too wrote letters to the D.A. on a recommendation that I should express how much potential my son had and how his dad and I would be there to help him, to support him, etc..... Well, the letters worked (did this 2 times) my son was given probation and nothing changed, it progressed to be worse. It's very natural for parents to want to help their children but sometimes they just have to learn on their own. It's like a hot stove, you tell them "don't touch, it's hot" but they won't listen and the go over and touch it and get burned. Sometimes our kids just have to learn the hard way and we really need to let them. As for anyone giving you heat, do your best to just let that go. There are always going to be people who will pass judgment on how we choose to deal with our D.C's. They have not walked in our shoes, they have not had the sleepless nights, they have not dealt with not knowing where your child is for days or weeks, they have not felt the fear we have, they have not seen their child in jail or high on drugs, they do not know what it's like for us so it's easy for them to think they would handle it differently. I think you are doing a great job in dealing with all of this. Don't doubt yourself. ((HUGS)) to you................... [/QUOTE]
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