I'm back

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by Katlin, Jan 22, 2009.

  1. Katlin

    Katlin New Member

    I started posting here in times of crisis many years ago. My daughter made my life a living hell for the whole time she was growing up. Major, major tantrums from the time she was a young infant. Swearing, running away from the time she was ten and the list is endless. Special Education starting in 6th grade. counselors both in and out of school from kindergarten throughout and youth home, B&E, DUIs, twice. Then she turned 18. I was down on my knees thanking God. The next day she told me she was pregnant. Cut to the present. Ten years later. I ended up adopting her first child. My daughter had two more children with a semi decent man. Those two children had myself, the other Grandma and a nice house through HUD. My daughter continued with drugs, drinking, losing jobs and the whole nine yards. Last year she and the children's father had a huge fight. He went to jail for a year and now she just left MI. and took my two young beautiful grand children to Fl. and I can do nothing. She has custody, (even though she has been under oversight from Protective Services. She cannot even begin to take care of herself, much less those two innocent babies. She hates me for "stealing her daughter". and will not tell me where she is. Also rumored that she is pregnant again.

    Now, I can go crazy worrying about my dear grandchildren and frankly by this time I can't help thinking the unthinkable and that is that I shouldn't have struggled so hard to keep her alive back in the growing up years because now she may cause something to happen to her babies. The nightmare never ends. There is another thing. These last two children would have probably been taken away if it weren't for massive support from myself, the other GP and bio dad. I should have let that happen. If I get the chance I will let that happen. Please pray for my grandchildren. A little girl, age 8 and a tiny, sweet beautiful little boy age 6.

    I see from the names here that many of you have continued with your own sad journey into adulthood. I have often wished I had become a nun or something. I have three other wonderful and successful children who all finished college with honors and I raised them alone. Other wonderful Grandchildren, and my sweetheart, the adopted 10 year old DGD. Even so, I sometimes envy childless women. Not for me but for the pain she has caused her own children. Thanks for still being here. Katlin
  2. Wishing

    Wishing New Member

    You are to be commended for how much you have done for your grandchildren. It's too bad our kids don't see or can't see
    it is often our efforts that keep them safe. She sounds so difficult.Those grandkids are so precious Prayers going up for their safety.
  3. Katlin

    Katlin New Member

    Thank you for your kind reply. I'm sitting here unable to sleep and looking for comfort from others here. I thought this was the only place where there were people who could understand, what it was like to deal with kids like my daughter, and I still believe that. Almost everyone wants to give you advice but unless you have lived with A difficult child, you can't conceive of what life is like.
    I'm also up with a very sick kitty until I can get him to the vet tomorrow. We rescue animals and have 9 cats and two rabbits. We try to find homes but end up keeping a few. While we took a short walk around the block we found this nearly frozen little kitten. We looked for mom or siblings but no luck. Anyway, thank you for your prayers and please include my little stray. Katlin
  4. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful



    If Protective Services has an open case on her, call them and let them know she has taken the kids to Florida. They can contact CPS there and let them know the score. Heck, never know, they might even decide to hunt her down. Doesn't hurt to try.

    I'm so very very sorry. been there done that with K when we didn't have a clue as to what was going on. So scary. So devistating.

    Since she has leaned on you and other GPs so much with the kids......hopefully you'll hear from her soon that she can't handle them on her own and ask for help.

    I'll be praying hard for those kids, and for you too.

    Many gentle (((hugs)))
  5. goldenguru

    goldenguru Active Member

    Hi Kaitlin - Welcome back.

    I'm so sorry for your grandchildren. And for your grandmothers heart.

    I'm guessing your daughter will resurface - when she runs out of money - or energy - or desire to be a responsible parent.

    I would probably contact protective services to notify them of your daughters disappearance. They might have some advice. Keep us updated.
  6. Suz

    Suz (the future) MRS. GERE

    Hi Katlin,

    I'm sorry for your aching heart.

  7. Katlin

    Katlin New Member

    Thanks to all of you for your advice and comforting presence.

    I called the agency here who worked with her here. They were going to contact the child protective people there.
    I am waiting to hear back. Apparently she had permission to go to Fl. to, look for a job. WHY. They should have insisted she leave kids here while she put her own life on the line.

    When I step into my daughters life and interfere in anyway she becomes furious. She will do the opposite of what I tell her every time, just on principal. She has threatened my life on several occasions for "Stealing her daughter". In my whole life I have never met another child like mine. It is a miracle that she had three beautiful and intelligent children. I am so sleep deprived and scared I can't write here very well. Please pray for these sweet babies. by the way. Kitten is staying at the vets for a few days and then hopefully we will find a home. Thanks again, Diane
  8. rejectedmom

    rejectedmom New Member

    I am sorry for your pain. -RM
  9. judi

    judi Active Member

    Katlin - I'm so sorry for you and your precious grandchildren. Your granddaughter is so lucky to have you.
  10. Fran

    Fran Former desparate mom

    I'm sorry that your difficult child is so sick and self absorbed that she can not think of her children's well being. I hope she does the right thing for them regardless of her illness.
  11. catwoman

    catwoman New Member

    Katlin, I understand what you mean when you say that sometimes you envy people without children. If I could go back knowing what I do now, I seriously doubt I would ever have kids again. I'm so tired of the worry and pain.

    I hope the kitty is well. I also rescue cats, you can see some of them at www.grizabellascats.petfinder.com It's always nice to meet another animal lover!