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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 691065" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>She is obviously very sick...Maybe borderline personality disorder. Borderlines need to control, don't do any relationships well and are, to be frank, erratic and mean sometimes. They are consistently inconsistent and rarely get help because they believe everyone else is a mess, not them.</p><p></p><p>Your daughter is 45. I suspect she was always this way. She probably will continue. If you don't want to cut her off, in my opinion the best thing you can do is to take steps back and realize that this is who she is, how she interacts. It's not personal. Don't let her off the wall comments hurt you. She us who she is. You know her by now.</p><p></p><p>If you can't help but take things to heart, you may want to back off contacting her, stop reading her texts or talking to her. Only do so if you feel up to taking a hit. She us a middle age woman and you don't have to listen to her abusing you. Do it on your own time. Don't try to reason with her. You cant. Just listen and saying "huh uh" every so often and tell her somebody us at the door if you need to get off quickly.</p><p></p><p>Frankly, she sounds toxic to everyone. It's too bad about the boy but there is nothing anyone can do except he kind to him when/if she allows you to see him. People like this use their kids to punish others. Again, your daughter doesn't think right so you have to learn to expect this from her. I know...it's sad.</p><p></p><p></p><p>Nobody on earth, even a child of yours, should have so much power over your life that you can't function. If this is so, do seek professional help.</p><p></p><p>Go out with friends or loving family. Rekindle hobbies. Volunterr. Focus on YOUR life now. Live happy golden years, not controlled by a crabby daughter who hurts you. Stand strong!!.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 691065, member: 1550"] She is obviously very sick...Maybe borderline personality disorder. Borderlines need to control, don't do any relationships well and are, to be frank, erratic and mean sometimes. They are consistently inconsistent and rarely get help because they believe everyone else is a mess, not them. Your daughter is 45. I suspect she was always this way. She probably will continue. If you don't want to cut her off, in my opinion the best thing you can do is to take steps back and realize that this is who she is, how she interacts. It's not personal. Don't let her off the wall comments hurt you. She us who she is. You know her by now. If you can't help but take things to heart, you may want to back off contacting her, stop reading her texts or talking to her. Only do so if you feel up to taking a hit. She us a middle age woman and you don't have to listen to her abusing you. Do it on your own time. Don't try to reason with her. You cant. Just listen and saying "huh uh" every so often and tell her somebody us at the door if you need to get off quickly. Frankly, she sounds toxic to everyone. It's too bad about the boy but there is nothing anyone can do except he kind to him when/if she allows you to see him. People like this use their kids to punish others. Again, your daughter doesn't think right so you have to learn to expect this from her. I know...it's sad. Nobody on earth, even a child of yours, should have so much power over your life that you can't function. If this is so, do seek professional help. Go out with friends or loving family. Rekindle hobbies. Volunterr. Focus on YOUR life now. Live happy golden years, not controlled by a crabby daughter who hurts you. Stand strong!!. [/QUOTE]
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