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I'm feeling desperate
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 671991" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I have two ideas of what could be wrong, neither easy to fix and one unable to be fixed but can be managed if you are very much aware of where she is at all times. in my opinion this happened in her mother's uterus since her birth mother took drungs and drank while pregnant and I know many people who adopted kids who had similar histories and the accompanying problems you state. I am thinking of fetal alcohol spectrum...it is organic brain damage from the drugs/alcohol and a specialist should be seen to diagnose. Just any old therapist won't do. Must be somebody who understands this sad, preventable disorder. Theses kids, at their worst, do not understand right from wrong nor do they learn from discipline. We adopted a boy who we thought might have it, but fortunately it was autism (another possibility) and he is doing well. You need INTENSIVE testing to see what's up and what you can do.</p><p>Take a look at attachment disorder too. This is not her fault nor yours nor can you alone fix it with the normal type of therapy. This happens when a child lives a chaotic infancy to three and loses their birthparent and the drugs don't help.</p><p>I wish you well. This is not easy.</p><p>When you have your baby, please don't leave her alone without being near you or your husband. You don't know what's going on or what your older child will do. Better to be safe than sorry.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 671991, member: 1550"] I have two ideas of what could be wrong, neither easy to fix and one unable to be fixed but can be managed if you are very much aware of where she is at all times. in my opinion this happened in her mother's uterus since her birth mother took drungs and drank while pregnant and I know many people who adopted kids who had similar histories and the accompanying problems you state. I am thinking of fetal alcohol spectrum...it is organic brain damage from the drugs/alcohol and a specialist should be seen to diagnose. Just any old therapist won't do. Must be somebody who understands this sad, preventable disorder. Theses kids, at their worst, do not understand right from wrong nor do they learn from discipline. We adopted a boy who we thought might have it, but fortunately it was autism (another possibility) and he is doing well. You need INTENSIVE testing to see what's up and what you can do. Take a look at attachment disorder too. This is not her fault nor yours nor can you alone fix it with the normal type of therapy. This happens when a child lives a chaotic infancy to three and loses their birthparent and the drugs don't help. I wish you well. This is not easy. When you have your baby, please don't leave her alone without being near you or your husband. You don't know what's going on or what your older child will do. Better to be safe than sorry. [/QUOTE]
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