I'm going to start breaking things......

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Star*, May 9, 2012.

  1. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    Not in a mean way ---But The last few days of DF being in the den assembling the new BBQ grill have been heaven. I've had more peace and solitude than I can even tell you - and it's been -(bursts into song again) I"ve got a lovely bunch of coconuts - do dah le do."

    The grill is almost complete....so he's taken to wandering down the hall - to the office - AGAIN. For the most mundane things. For the most RIDICULOUS questions. For the most :runcirclsmiley2:are you serious you have to come in here and interrupt my thougt AGAIN for WHAT?

    I've shut my door, I've put a note on there when I'm talking on the phone to potential jobs, I've held up a hand or arm - in hopes that he would not blast in the room and every time it's the SAME thing. I have the door shut, I'm talking to a potential job offer and he walks in, I have either the house phone or the cell phone to my ear, my back to him and i'm LISTENING.....and because I'm not TALKING....he says loudly (because he can't hear) "ARE YOU ON THE .........OH IS SEE YOU ARE ON THE........Okay, OKAY) and at this point I'm trying to hear the person on the phone and waive him off -politely) and he continues - WELL THEN I'LL come back 0kay - WHEN YOU'RE NOT ON THE PHONE.......and DO YOU WANT ME TO SHUT THE DOOR......I'LL just shut the DOOR." and by then whatever information the person on the phone gave me? I'm clueless.

    Then I get upset and hang up, walk out in the den and say - CAn you turn that tv down? Can you TURN THAT TV DOWN (looks my direction) - CAN YOU PLEASE TURN THAT TV DOWN? and finally he fumbles for the remote and turns it down. Then says (and if I never here HUH or WHAT again It will be too soon) I didn't hear you HUH? So I go through explaining that when my door is shut - please leave me alone. I'm on job calls. INTERVIEWs....and he said "WEll How am I supposed to know that - the door is shut?" BECAUSE IF THE DOOR IS SHUT I NEED TO BE LEFT ALONE. What did you want anyway now that I'm here? Um......Oh I forgot now.

    So I go back to the office, shut the door.....and get back on the phone. I'm in the middle of a call......and YUP.....The door bolts open, he comes in......and it starts ARE YOU ON THE.........OH I SEE YOU ARE ON THE........OKAY.....OKAY.......WELL THEN WHENYOU GET OFF - COME SEE ME - I REMEMBERED WHAT IT WAS THAT I CAME IN FOR LAST TIME........DO you WANT ME TO SHUT THE DOOR? ....I'll just shut it....

    And GOOD GRIEF I love that man - but OH HOW I wish some days ........

    This goes on - like 10-12 times a day sometimes. UNLESS his friend stops by and then he doesn't MOVE from the den - they watch tv together - and he'll get up, fix himself some lunch, and return to the man cave - and it's like - WHY on the days when that guy is here - do you not bother me? Or WHY when you h ave a grill to assemble to you leave me alone?

    It's like the minute I park my butt in the office chair I SWEAR a light goes off in the den......BOTHER HER.....BOTHER HER..........BOTHER HER...........will you trim my hair, will you cut my toenails, will you look at this bump? Is this a bug bite? I dunno - you have two eyes - what do you think? I was in the middle of pruning my resume - does this look like a properly formed CV? Is this sentence correctly articulated to give me the most value with the least words about myself? BUG BITE? C'mon. I don't see spa /salon nail tech on my resume - cut my toenails? For the love of Sally Hansen - leave me be.

    Is it just me? I mean I realize I'm out of work and I have tried to stay OUT of his way and not cramp HIS style.........I realize being home is a blip on his routine - but I do NOT bother him - I stay busy other end of the house.......

    ANYONE else in this situation or is it as per usual JUST YOU STAR???????

    Lord I'm going to start taking things apart and dragging them into the den - I can see me now up at midnight - sneeking into the garage taking apart the blender or the lawn tractor - waking up in the morning with it all apart disassembled in the driveway - DANG thieves - They must have been trying to get it on a moped - well at least it looks like all the parts are here - (*hands wrench) better get busy - I need to mow the lawn this weekend)

    If I thought midol would fix this? I'd get a case.
  2. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    DF must be my H's clone....ridiculous questions? I think that comes in the Man Manual, Star! Make a DO NOT DISTURB sign and hang it on the door when you're on the phone. Apparently, the fact that it is closed doesn't signal HIS brain that you need uninterrupted time and space (my H is the same way, almost that a closed door NEEDS to be checked out).

    I am routinely asked to help H find his glasses...no not THOSE glasses, the OTHER glasses...and I almost always find them under the exact same couch cushion as the last time he fell asleep on the couch and they fell off his head and were pushed under the cushion when he finally heaved himself off the couch to come to bed at midnight....yeesh.

    When he and easy child were away this weekend, it was so nice to have everything in it's place, clean towels hung on the towel rack, the shower curtain pulled closed, no floods around the sink, uninterrupted reading, phone calls and bathroom time...the moment the arrive, every thing changes! I feel ya, Star.
  3. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Ohhh Starbie... This is my life, too - except - it's not husband - it's JETT!!!

    Knock knock... I'm peeing, what?... Uhhh OK.

    (I go upstairs) What did you need?... HUG?

    5 minutes later - out to the mailbox - Mom?... Yes?... HUG?

    10 more - following me into the laundry room - OK, what now?... I forget.

    Going downstairs to pee, I'll be right back... OK... Knock knock... I'm peeing, what?... Uhhh OK.

    Repeat, ad infinitum...
  4. keista

    keista New Member

    Men are no different than children - the second the phone is at your ear they NEED you! hang up the phone, make yourself available and they for get waht they needed now you are bothering them! :sigh:
  5. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Star... you don't have an over-flowing job jar for DF????
  6. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    Duct tape. Just sayin'. You can use it on the door, or you can use it on the man. Your choice.
  7. donna723

    donna723 Well-Known Member

    Well, Star, at least he didn't throw the door open and yell, "MAKE ME A SAMMICH, WOMAN!"

  8. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    Well ......(laughs and chuckles outloud)

    I DID have a sign on the door - and it wasn't ugly - it says .....MIND YOU THERE ARE ONLY TWO OF US IN THE HOUSE - who else would it be for? PLEASE DO NOT ENTER IF SHUT.....thanks.

    He says - "WELL YOU NEVER OPEN THE DOOR".......OH LORD. THats not trueeeeee. I go to bed.....eventually. sigh.

    And as far as duct tape Witz - I'm preeeeeeeety certain I could get creative -------but it just never occured to me until JUST NOW - to use it as a mansitter. LORD the marketing applications! :hi5:

    Donna Comments like that would only get him indignant stares in the Star household. And possibly ugly 2nd grade face making behind his back.
  9. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    It's all so familiar isn't it? Yup, my sweet fiancee will stand at the frig door and yell, "where is the (enter any food item)?" Or, a few times a day, "where are my glasses." As Rosanne said years ago, "do they think the Uterus is a homing device?"

    I know this may sound sappy and sentimental, perhaps it's my age, but lots of stuff that used to bother me doesn't anymore because I look at him and I think, it's likely that he will go to the big Baseball field in the sky before I will, (statistically speaking) and then I think, he will be gone and then I will really miss those weird things he does. Every time I do that, my annoyance fades out and I remember how much he means to me. (But, maybe you have to get to be older before you can think that way and not want to break things!!)
  10. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    This had me laughing, because H says that all the time, "Use your uterus and help me find it!" or, lately, "Oh no! Do you think that once you're in menopause your uterus will stop working?" LOL. Jerk. Yeah, but I love him anyway. Jerk.
  11. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    It's a man/kid thing.

    Currently I'm sitting here watching easy child's boys. Normally Brandon plays while Connor naps until Darrin gets home then all 3 play or watch cartoons whatever. Don't really pay a whole lot of attention to Nana, well Connor does but you know what I mean. But let me decide to scrounge the internet for jobs...............and Connor has still not fallen alseep and it's 3:25 so I'll be getting him up here in a minute, Brandon has come over and been asking me stuff ever 3 seconds and 90 percent of it I can't figure out what he's saying. I did manage a list of 5 "potentials". Two look really promising in the wage/benefit angle and aren't too far from town. One would be phlebotomy, yes I know I said I'd never do it but I'm getting desperate and it appears these folks are too but this one is also out of town so it will depend on the pay, and one in town that would be easy peasy if the pay is right and if they could give me enough hours...........pharmacy tech.

    Star, you should look into pharmacy techs. Most drug stores train you, you don't need outside training........at least here you don't (you make more if you do but it's not required) pays more than min wage usually with decent benefits.

    So........so much for utilitizing my time while watching the boys other than just sitting and watching them play. lol Besides, I'm using easy child's laptop so I can't really favorite anything.........and have to write down anything I do find so I can look it up when I get home to do the applications ect.

    But as far back as I can remember, let me get on the phone to do anything and suddenly everyone in the house requires mom's undivided attention............including furbabies.
  12. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    The other thing that's guaranteed to result in a line-up of "gotta-have-Mom"s... is to sink into a nice warm tub intending to soak. (which is why I only do that after everybody else is ASLEEP)
  13. rejectedmom

    rejectedmom New Member

    Yep it is a man/kid thing, my husband does it too.