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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 653340" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>It is sad.</p><p></p><p>But your concern is your son and you know he was in on it and you also know, you MUST know in the back of your mind (denial is a tough foe) that he was the one who took the other stuff. It is a coincidence? Things keep disappearing? It's never him? Then he gets defensive when you blame him. Why? I read once that an innocent person just says, "No." A guilty person goes on a rampage and turns it on you. </p><p></p><p>You know who he is choosing as "friends" (cough). I don't care how socially inept he is. Sonic is too, but he would never hang with drug abusers. It is a choice. There are other ways, better ways, to make friends. Your son is also choosing a dangerous girlfriend who may not be on birth control and he is already going to be a father, or at least a sperm donor, once. Will he be in the child's life? He sure isn't acting like it. You can't force him to. At his age you can't force him to do anything.</p><p></p><p>To be honest, if it were my kid, I'd let him sell all his treasures. That will be a good lessons for him since he will then be without. I would NOT let him steal my stuff and if I called the cops, it would not be to say, "Well, he may have taken it, but he says A, Bc and C really did it." His involvement would be enough for me. The idea of the cops is to try to scare the kids straight and we have no power or real relationship with the other kids who may have helped him do the deed. If he k new about it, if he let them in the house (and I think this is a stetch...I still believe he masterminded it) then he also needs to learn that legally he is in hot water. What else MAY make them stop??</p><p></p><p>I am totally convinced, as is my Princess, that if we had been soft on her, she would not have quit. She claims she got so sick of the threats, the life, just the affects of the drugs and getting into trouble...basically she is and always has been a loving, good person. So is your son. But it is hard to quit. There is peer pressure that is far more potent than what Mom says, especially if Mom doesn't follow through and Dad just does nothing. </p><p></p><p>Maybe he needs a scare to quit and not have you believing that ABC did it, not him. Why was he with ABC, even on the off chance that it's true? How did they get into your house? You will never get absolute proof. I only knew what went on with Princess after she quit and we sat down and had a frank, if not scary, discussion about what drug life is. If she had never quit, we never would have known what it was like because my big imagination did not go that far. I had no idea that people were threatening her life or the lives of all of us. I have never taken drugs, don't even drink, have no clue about the culture...well, I didn't. Now I do. </p><p></p><p>I hope this story gets better. I know your son has good in him. I think it is the drugs talking, but that's serious. And you are a good person and a very diligent Mama Bear and stronger than you know.</p><p></p><p>Hugs for your hurting heart.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 653340, member: 1550"] It is sad. But your concern is your son and you know he was in on it and you also know, you MUST know in the back of your mind (denial is a tough foe) that he was the one who took the other stuff. It is a coincidence? Things keep disappearing? It's never him? Then he gets defensive when you blame him. Why? I read once that an innocent person just says, "No." A guilty person goes on a rampage and turns it on you. You know who he is choosing as "friends" (cough). I don't care how socially inept he is. Sonic is too, but he would never hang with drug abusers. It is a choice. There are other ways, better ways, to make friends. Your son is also choosing a dangerous girlfriend who may not be on birth control and he is already going to be a father, or at least a sperm donor, once. Will he be in the child's life? He sure isn't acting like it. You can't force him to. At his age you can't force him to do anything. To be honest, if it were my kid, I'd let him sell all his treasures. That will be a good lessons for him since he will then be without. I would NOT let him steal my stuff and if I called the cops, it would not be to say, "Well, he may have taken it, but he says A, Bc and C really did it." His involvement would be enough for me. The idea of the cops is to try to scare the kids straight and we have no power or real relationship with the other kids who may have helped him do the deed. If he k new about it, if he let them in the house (and I think this is a stetch...I still believe he masterminded it) then he also needs to learn that legally he is in hot water. What else MAY make them stop?? I am totally convinced, as is my Princess, that if we had been soft on her, she would not have quit. She claims she got so sick of the threats, the life, just the affects of the drugs and getting into trouble...basically she is and always has been a loving, good person. So is your son. But it is hard to quit. There is peer pressure that is far more potent than what Mom says, especially if Mom doesn't follow through and Dad just does nothing. Maybe he needs a scare to quit and not have you believing that ABC did it, not him. Why was he with ABC, even on the off chance that it's true? How did they get into your house? You will never get absolute proof. I only knew what went on with Princess after she quit and we sat down and had a frank, if not scary, discussion about what drug life is. If she had never quit, we never would have known what it was like because my big imagination did not go that far. I had no idea that people were threatening her life or the lives of all of us. I have never taken drugs, don't even drink, have no clue about the culture...well, I didn't. Now I do. I hope this story gets better. I know your son has good in him. I think it is the drugs talking, but that's serious. And you are a good person and a very diligent Mama Bear and stronger than you know. Hugs for your hurting heart. [/QUOTE]
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