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I'm nearly over this
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<blockquote data-quote="LauraH" data-source="post: 759684" data-attributes="member: 22877"><p>That's a familiar story. When my son isn't using or angry with me he will call me just to chat. He stopped calling for money or favors two years ago when I finally put my foot down. On rare occasions he will ask for help getting one of his prescriptions and I have usually agreed. But this last time, the boyfriend told me he bought drugs with it...so even if contact is reestablished, helping with the occasional script is finished too. </p><p></p><p>And when he does call just to check in or say hi, it's always about him. If I talk about myself (good or bad or indifferent) or my sister's alzheimer's or anything else, he will say a few appropriate words of response and then shift the topic to him. He seems to have no real interest in what is going on in anyone's life other than his own. And completely oblivious to others' situations. He called me one evening while I was at the pharmacy waiting for a prescription after being in the ER for pneumonia. All I wanted to do was get my medications, go home and go to bed. He seemed offended and couldn't understand why I didn't feel like chit chatting. He didn't even say "Hope you feel better." He did say "Well call me when you get home." (I didn't because like I said all I was focused on was taking my medications and going to bed) Is this a genetic or biological thing we're born with, this lack of empathy? For the longest I just wrote it off to his age and immaturity because small children are inherently self-centered. But at 32 that's no longer a valid excuse or reason.</p><p></p><p>Did Kay get her SS on her own? I have been urging my son for several years to apply for disability. Between his bipolar and addiction he can't keep a job and is unemployed for longer periods of time than he is employed. He does have Medicaid and food stamps, which is something, but those don't pay rent or cell phone bills. He won't even consider it because he says it wouldn't pay enough. Like being unemployed with no income pays more??? Anyway I stopped nagging about that a couple of years also. Like my husband says, not my circus, not my monkeys. How he survives or gets by is his wagon to pull.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="LauraH, post: 759684, member: 22877"] That's a familiar story. When my son isn't using or angry with me he will call me just to chat. He stopped calling for money or favors two years ago when I finally put my foot down. On rare occasions he will ask for help getting one of his prescriptions and I have usually agreed. But this last time, the boyfriend told me he bought drugs with it...so even if contact is reestablished, helping with the occasional script is finished too. And when he does call just to check in or say hi, it's always about him. If I talk about myself (good or bad or indifferent) or my sister's alzheimer's or anything else, he will say a few appropriate words of response and then shift the topic to him. He seems to have no real interest in what is going on in anyone's life other than his own. And completely oblivious to others' situations. He called me one evening while I was at the pharmacy waiting for a prescription after being in the ER for pneumonia. All I wanted to do was get my medications, go home and go to bed. He seemed offended and couldn't understand why I didn't feel like chit chatting. He didn't even say "Hope you feel better." He did say "Well call me when you get home." (I didn't because like I said all I was focused on was taking my medications and going to bed) Is this a genetic or biological thing we're born with, this lack of empathy? For the longest I just wrote it off to his age and immaturity because small children are inherently self-centered. But at 32 that's no longer a valid excuse or reason. Did Kay get her SS on her own? I have been urging my son for several years to apply for disability. Between his bipolar and addiction he can't keep a job and is unemployed for longer periods of time than he is employed. He does have Medicaid and food stamps, which is something, but those don't pay rent or cell phone bills. He won't even consider it because he says it wouldn't pay enough. Like being unemployed with no income pays more??? Anyway I stopped nagging about that a couple of years also. Like my husband says, not my circus, not my monkeys. How he survives or gets by is his wagon to pull. [/QUOTE]
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