Oh Linda... I just ache for you. I am worrying here about you too, and wishing there weren't umpteen feet of snow and several hundred miles between us.
Practical stuff today - take your medications, eat healthy, rest when you can. Call CM and see what reinforcements you can get in for you and ktbug this week. *Don't* fret about the stuff you have no control of - it will work out however it will work out - it's not a priority today. Delegate the stuff you can (as much as you can) to his sibs. You need to do your best TLC for you. You are the rock of the family, hon - always have been, always will be.
No guilt - he hid this so very well. I cannot begin to imagine the sense of loss, but I'm rattling beads like crazy here that husband's stubborness will serve him well right now, that his body will fight to rally, and that he gets the opportunity to make changes for himself and your family.
I love you darlin' and will do anything I can for you. Please take care of you!