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I'm upset!!!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="janebrain" data-source="post: 11379" data-attributes="member: 3208"><p>Hi,</p><p>I'm with everyone else on this too--let her handle the consequences and don't let her move home. In fact, you are doing her a huge favor if you allow her to figure this out on her own. I felt as you do about my difficult child--that she had so many emotional problems she couldn't make it in the real world. She seemed so fragile and seemed to need me so much. It wasn't until I got so fed up and so worried about the emotional health of my younger dtr that I kicked her out--then she floundered for a little while (living in Red Cross shelter, avoiding getting job) and then she finally decided to pick herself up and take on adult responsibilities (she is 18). I was amazed that within a very short space of time she managed to get a job and started trying to run her own life. Lately she has broken up with the bad boyfriend and she says she feels empowered--she found out she can take care of herself. She works at Dunkin' Donuts and takes her job very seriously--her manager loves her and provides a lot of encouragement. I never would have believed that she could take care of herself---her therapist wondered if she was capable of working. Well, I don't think she would have done any of this if I hadn't gotten out of the way and forced her to do it. We have a very good relationship at this point and I get to hear those vindicating words, "Mom, you were right."</p><p></p><p>Stay strong!!</p><p></p><p>Hugs,</p><p>Jane</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="janebrain, post: 11379, member: 3208"] Hi, I'm with everyone else on this too--let her handle the consequences and don't let her move home. In fact, you are doing her a huge favor if you allow her to figure this out on her own. I felt as you do about my difficult child--that she had so many emotional problems she couldn't make it in the real world. She seemed so fragile and seemed to need me so much. It wasn't until I got so fed up and so worried about the emotional health of my younger dtr that I kicked her out--then she floundered for a little while (living in Red Cross shelter, avoiding getting job) and then she finally decided to pick herself up and take on adult responsibilities (she is 18). I was amazed that within a very short space of time she managed to get a job and started trying to run her own life. Lately she has broken up with the bad boyfriend and she says she feels empowered--she found out she can take care of herself. She works at Dunkin' Donuts and takes her job very seriously--her manager loves her and provides a lot of encouragement. I never would have believed that she could take care of herself---her therapist wondered if she was capable of working. Well, I don't think she would have done any of this if I hadn't gotten out of the way and forced her to do it. We have a very good relationship at this point and I get to hear those vindicating words, "Mom, you were right." Stay strong!! Hugs, Jane [/QUOTE]
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