I don't know whether I'm just venting - I think mainly, I am looking for understanding... I am tired of being in the "lose-lose" position of being difficult child's Mom. Any other adult gets the "sweet and charming" version of difficult child - I get the nasty stuff. Everything coming out of difficult child's mouth is a lie. All of it. Good stuff. Bad stuff. It doesn't matter - none of it is true....and honestly, I don't know whether difficult child can even tell the difference between "truth" and "lies". This week, for example, there is an ROTC event to which parents are invited. I would like to go and cheer on my daughter. difficult child cannot even give me a straight answer as to what time it starts. (10am - no 9am. Wait...no. I don't know....10 or 9, I guess - just come whenever you want.) husband is so disgusted with the bs he's not coming. It's hard to blame him. Report cards came out this week. difficult child says she "didn't get hers"....but that's OK - because grades don't matter to her. Besides, she's going to ace her way out of all of her final exams by getting good grades during the semester. The reality? - she's failing math. If she doesn't pass - she won't graduate. Good thing grades don't matter... I feel like I just cannot win, with this kid, ever. I can't support her in positive things - I can't help her through negative things. No matter what - I'm the nasty, b*tchy, horribly unsupportive Mean Mom who should have known what time the event was or should have known that difficult child needed help with her homework or shoulda, woulda, coulda some other thing....and no matter what, this all just proves that Mom does not love her. Instead, difficult child wants to share her successes and failures with other adults - other people who are SOOO much better than Mom in every way. And if I may confess something? Sometimes I do wish that difficult child does NOT participate in something or other, because it is less painful that way. It's easier on the heart to listen to difficult child complain that she is not this, that or the other thing - than listen to how great it was that Mr. R came to her concert or that Mrs. M was smiling in the front row...Oh, Mom was there, too? Oh... Does that make me a bad person?