In school suspension


New Member
Ok I am beyond angry. GFGgot a couple of suspensions in Dec when he had some random acts of aggression largely due to starting Zoloft. That's discountinued he is back to his "normal behavior" which is generally ok, sometimes off task. He got written up a teacher who he has had few issues with this year because my son thought he had received permission to go to the bathroom and went, teacher claimed he hadn't. A misunderstanding we think. And in any event hardly of the same level of his previous suspensions. Plus they kept him out of school for 8 half days in Jan to see how he was and wait for the behavior assessment to be done which is isn't yet. He is on an IEP. His Special Education teacher changed his classes around so that he would have an aide in this one class that difficult child wasn't real happy about but he dealt with ok. We thought that was the end of it.

So we are writing the principal to tell him that we think that the discipline policy is being applied inflexibly, he is placing my son on such and such a level because of previous incidents so now no matter what he does it is suspsension.

I haven't been this angry in a long time. I am seriously considering saying that we will be homeschoooling difficult child until the school completes the behavior assessment and comes up with a non punitive behavior plan. There is no way difficult child wants to serve an in school suspension for this and while I have always tried to accept rationale of school I'm beyond livid at this. I really think the new principal's discipline policy is out of control.

Any thoughts? My son would hate to be homeschooled, but honestly with this bunch of inflexible small minded people running the place I am really tempted. I figure they might decide to forego the suspension and get the FBA completed aSAP.

Smoke out of the ears....
Last edited:


Roll With It
Push for a manifestation hearing. The days he was only there half the time count as suspension days, so surely he is over 10. ISS counts also - ANY placement outside his regular schedule counts as I understand the law, so if he is at 10 days then they CANNOT suspend him.

Check into homeschooling groups in your area. You might find that he actually enjoys it, esp if he can find some kids he gets along with. I found that as a general rule kids who have been homeschooled are more accepting of other kids regardless of their ages/quirks. Be sure to check into whatever notification you need to do.

If you tell the school that you will homeschool until the FBA is done they may never complete it as you have "pulled him out" or "un-enrolled" him.

Call the state dept of ed/special services whatever it is called. in my opinion they are really going over the line. If your advocate thinks this is OK, ask for a new one. If you don't have one, get one asap.

I would be livid also. Will your therapist or psychiatrist give you a list of accommodations and ways his disabilities manifest so that you have more ammo to nail this idiot principal with? in my opinion he is going to want to say this is because attachment issues and NOT school issues and the school can't/shouldn't/won't do anything to help because it is a "family problem". GRRRRRRR.

I am so sorry.


Well-Known Member
Yeah, I don't think pulling him out for homeschooling would be the way - it might actually give them the opportunity to delay the FBA. Count up the ISS and OSS and the half days. If they equal 10, I agree with susiestar, push for the manifestation hearing. Perhaps if you show this new principal that you mean business and are no "pushover parent" he will do what is SUPPOSED to do!



New Member
From what I have read half day suspension only counts as half day so we aren't at 10 yet. I really want to get along with the school but this is really way over the line. I am not sending the kid to school until we get it sorted out. But I am afraid they can declare him truant. HIs psychiatrist would probably give me a letter about the non helpful discipline policy but that would probably take some time to organize. What's the best way to keep my kid out of school until we can get it sorted it?

He met with another school official on Thursday whom he likes so he handled the discussion well but if he goes back and tries to argue with the principal we will probably end up in juvie. sigh. We have no school today.


Well-Known Member
I, too, would not recommend turning to homeschooling at this stage. The protection he needs should be part of his IEP and enforceable through the school system. Your son may not fit the norm but at his age I think the isolation of homeschooling could impact his sense of belonging. If he has had complete neuro/psychological testing the IEP should include what the appropriate (and legally required) actions should be implemented. One person can not take on the school system with success. One person with documented proof of disability can united with an Advocate and make sure that fairness is in place.
Hugs. DDD


I didn't read any of the other responses, but you can always appeal the future suspensions. If your district operates likes ours, then they will have to go through a manifestation hearing to suspend him after he hits his 10 days because of his IEP. You could also rewrite part of his IEP to include that he gets "cool down passes" or break time or something of that nature when/if he switches medications in order to better prevent his outbursts.

We are just starting the IEP process with our 7-1/2 year old, but we are also both teachers so we intimately know the system and are comfortable shaking things up. We appealed our difficult child's last suspension of 5 days, and although it didn't get overturned, it DID hurry up the IEP process for us and is getting him the help he needs more quickly.

Good luck! I know school people can be frustrating to deal with.


New Member

i gotta be honest i went down the same road with-easy child. she got suspended many many times, was a whole lotta trouble for a while can still cause havoc when she wants to . yet she got an MO due to all of her bizarre behaviors and i went thru the same exact thing teachers, deans, security personnel in hallway rode her hard because of all the prior behaviors.

she called me and cried and i told her here's the deal your in the same school for four years. you have chosen to act a certain way, and do certain things that have left an impression on people. now, due to the past and yes this is life your being watched carefully and there may even be times that you will be in a situation where maybe you are right and their wrong. yet given time and continued good behavior those opinions people unfortunately formed about you will indeed change, you will see them responding differently and wanting to help you.

sure she got mad, yet she changed her behaviors and did the right thing as far as behavior went in school and attitudes and perceptions changed of staff, teachers, etc. i didnt wanna bail her out run to her aid sort of thing. i just kinda felt like she made her bed shes a teenager she has to learn natural consequences. anyway i was lucky and it worked.

i saw you wrote he acted out in school only due to a medication. so he never did anything wrong in school, other than the one time that was medication related? if thats' the case ignore everything i just wrote LOL.

can you tell i need sleep?? :)

good luck hugs!!


Roll With It
I would stop worrying about being nice to the school. Are they being nice to you and difficult child? It sure as sugar doesn't sound like it. It sounds like they want to run roughshod over his rights and use his disability to provoke him and punish him. in my opinion they are hoping that you will pull him out to homeschool or do something else so that they can expel him or force him into an alternative shcool or juvy situation so they don't have him messing up their "perfect" school and "perfect" kids.

How far has being nice gotten you so far? Use the sp ed archives and forum to get detailed help on how to handle this. Other than a letter from the psychiatrist or another doctor saying he needs to be home for X problem, you cannot keep him home from school until they behave appropriately toward him. You can appeal the suspension to the superintendent and it will be postponed until then, or you can push for a manifestation hearing and maybe due process. I don't know all the details about those things, so others will have better input on that.

Call an advocate and even a sp ed attorney to help you fight the school. (((((hugs)))))


Active Member
Pepper, I know in your school district there are not very many options, but if you hired an advocate, would they be able to say that he needed transported to different district to attend a different school? I forget if this kiddo is in high school or jr high, but there are some alternatives not too far and with an advocate you might be able to get the current school district to provide transportation. PM me if you want names of the other alternative schools.