I posted the following to "In Tears...." when Mamaof5 had a situation that she needed to tell her husband about and did not know how he would take it: (update following this post) "Last Monday, difficult child and I did something behind husband's back. It was unbelievable the guilt I felt as well as the fear of what would happen when husband arrived home which we thought would be Friday night. The thing we did was put $$$ down on a goldendoodle (very hard to find in our area). So, Tuesday night, difficult child and I had a "we may not be getting this" conversation which really upset difficult child but he handled it very well. I am pretty sure he knows where I am coming from even if it is not fair that he does not get a dog. I told difficult child that if husband says "no" than we just can not do it. I was shaking on our way home Monday and so worked up all week. I do lots of things without consulting him but this was a biggie since both of us had pretty much agreed neither of us ever wanted a dog and this would be a medium to large size one. He came home Thursday night and being the numbers guy he is, he was angry that we put $$ down without consulting him (I had told difficult child not to tell him we put $$ down, just that we had found one). I told husband to forget about the $$ - It was my $$ and if I loose it no big deal - bad lesson learned - he needed to let us know if difficult child could have a dog or not - if someone handed the puppy to us for free could we keep it? So, now husband is looking at fencing for the back yard and trying to find something cheaper. Everything he brings up sheds. I think we will be getting this goldendoodle (very low shedding) whose mom is a goldendoodle and dad is a poodle. I am still uncertain but difficult child really does need a dog of his own. (diva puppy belongs to Diva) difficult child is working out names - right now it may be Akita." Update: I am aware that the dog will not be totally non-shedding but still should not shed as much as most medium to large size dogs. I feel good that difficult child will do the brushing that is needed and we will keep her groomed. I have decided against a terrier (the easiest to find low to non-shedding medium size dog) because of their behaviors. They are too territorial and protective. I want a dog that is easy going and will not be scary toward the neighborhood kids or want to fight the neighborhood dogs. This is the year to get another dog if we get one at all. We can not wait another 2 years for the possibility of diva puppy moving out with Diva. In 2 years difficult child will be 15 and hopefully will have a job. He will not have the extra time to work with a puppy but I am certain he will remain devoted in the daily care of the dog. At that time, he will need a dog that has been trained (or atleast has had two years of training - training will be ongoing?) and used to the workings of our family. difficult child has proven himself to be able to care for a puppy. He is so devoted to diva puppy and would love to spend hours working on training a puppy of his own. This will be a great Summer project for him. Before husband arrived home, I had come to terms with my feelings and made it clear to difficult child that if husband absolutely says "no" then we will abide by his wishes. husband is working on getting a fence in the back yard and difficult child is certain we will get the goldendoodle. I am still so torn. I really don't want another dog. However, I see how difficult child is around dogs and I know it will be very good for him. He does need the companionship that a dog brings and he is old enough to be in charge of its care (with a little help from time to time). It is amazing what we will do for our kids sometimes! This is a HUGE sacrifice for husband and me.