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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 726396" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>welcome diana</p><p></p><p>my son now 29 is also adopted. </p><p></p><p>this is what jumps out to me:</p><p></p><p>your other kids deserve a voice and your protection. </p><p></p><p>you deserve the same.</p><p></p><p>your son is responsible for his actions and their consequences.</p><p></p><p>you have not abandoned your son. and standing up for yourself and family is not to abandon him.</p><p></p><p>i succumbed to pressure to accept my son back at age 19. i am unsure if i did the right thing. </p><p></p><p>your son's history and that of my own son are real and cannot be reversed or compensated for by our sacrifice or suffering. this is your son's real life. it is his to understand, to accept and to live. </p><p></p><p>that is what each of our lives are about. to come to terms with what has come before and to live our best life.</p><p></p><p>we as parents seem programmed to try to short circuit this process by inserting our own understanding, hard-learned truths, and efforts to protect.. to no avail. </p><p></p><p>this is what this site exists for: to help us understand this quandary and to understand we are not alone.</p><p></p><p>welcome.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 726396, member: 18958"] welcome diana my son now 29 is also adopted. this is what jumps out to me: your other kids deserve a voice and your protection. you deserve the same. your son is responsible for his actions and their consequences. you have not abandoned your son. and standing up for yourself and family is not to abandon him. i succumbed to pressure to accept my son back at age 19. i am unsure if i did the right thing. your son's history and that of my own son are real and cannot be reversed or compensated for by our sacrifice or suffering. this is your son's real life. it is his to understand, to accept and to live. that is what each of our lives are about. to come to terms with what has come before and to live our best life. we as parents seem programmed to try to short circuit this process by inserting our own understanding, hard-learned truths, and efforts to protect.. to no avail. this is what this site exists for: to help us understand this quandary and to understand we are not alone. welcome. [/QUOTE]
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