Is our 5 year old different ?

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by primus, Oct 5, 2009.

  1. primus

    primus New Member

    We have had (my wife and I) various comments recently that our 5 year old son is different. As a back story, he has had a first successful year in reception and previously, a very good year in pre-school. Although he has friends in class (not many), both his teacher and friends have commented that he is 'different'.

    He is not your atypical boy insofar as he is quite gentle, considerate and reflective. However, he is marginally obsessed with cars and all things engineering based. He often introduces himself to anyone as having an engine and makes various noises citing these as his engine or wheels and so on. He also goes up to other children (in play parks) etc and makes these noises or moves his arms in the pattern of wind-screen wipers (another of his favourites) without saying hello.

    At home, he has a comfortable, loving environment, interacts/plays with and cares for his younger brother immensely and has not struggled academically.

    We have put his behaviour down to be being age appropriate, socially underdeveloped (also age appropriate), having a very vivid imagination and most probably lacking in some confidence.

    Does anyone else have experience of their children behaving in a similar vein ?
  2. SRL

    SRL Active Member

    Hi primus, welcome to our forum.

    If you're receiving comments that people are noticing your son as somehow being different, I think I would at least look into that (as I know you are by starting here).

    We are all just parents here and obviously can't diagnose but the description that you wrote above immediately made me think of Asperger's Syndrome (the highest functioning of the Autistic Spectrum Disorders). Often the young children have some quirky behaviors, social differences, unusual obsessions for their age group, and speech that sounds older than their age.

    Here's several links for you to look through. I should mention that often when parents start researching it's common for a child to not fit all the symptoms.

    The arm motions that you are describing sound a lot like something called "stimming". You can google or even check out youtube for examples.

    I should also mention that it can be hard to get a diagnosis of AS in young children so if things a ringing a bell in the above links, you'll want to do your homework thoroughly.

    Do you often see him lining up toys or other objects in straight lines or formations?

    Hope this helps.
    Last edited: Oct 5, 2009
  3. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    What country do you come from? I never heard of reception and I can tell it's not the US because you spell behavior wrong ;) We are just parents, but to me he sounds like classic Aspergers. Did I say classic? :)

    I'd have him see a neuropsychologist. However, some countries don't allow you to just take him to a neuropsychologist (which is why I asked where you live). I have a spectrum kid and he is also very gentle, but he is different. As he got older, his differences became more obvious with his peers. It can help to have early interventions. If others are noticing it, as with my son, the differences are likely there and should be taken care of. These kids can be very naive in life and way too trusting and not "get social cues" so they really do need the assistance.

    My son also has an obsession and makes weird throat noises (stims). He is sixteen now and doing well, although he still talks to himself in his room. When asked why he'll say, "Nobody else is there so I talk to me." Or "I understand things better if I say them out loud." He has friends at school, but not loads of them and he doesn't seem to mind. He is still different, but he's delightful. He is bright and seems happy.

    Good luck, whatever you decide to do.