Is this detachment?

Discussion in 'Substance Abuse' started by mof, Aug 5, 2017.

  1. mof

    mof Momdidntsignupforthis

    Hey,

    I posted about a situation yesterday, but it has been 30 days since our son left our home due to a relapse..will not allow drugs in home..boundary crossed!

    Well we spoke yesterday..you see our son is too proud to ask for anything, you may not believe me, but he has never stolen from us either( this is his boundary). He has no money left, lives with a sober girls unfortunate family. I reached out and said I have a gift card and doctor co-pay..I found out he met with his PO Officer and had saved his fee for that. Asked if they would like to eat with us and if they could get here ( gas money an issue, its a good 30min drive)

    He laughed said, sure.They scraped 1.82 together and came.

    He looks..GOOD! He looks healthy, a bit thinner, but with no fast food no surprises. Looking for work, he loves work if he can make the good choices. I can tell he is taking his medications. They helped with dinner, we lost power so had ice cream as an appetizer..lol He isnt even smoking cigs...he laughed, he said, when you dont work you dont smoke!

    They left after some TV time, he laughed and said they needed to sleep here if i didnt get the gas , HA! I filled the car, gave a card for a haircut...and a food/gas card. That was OUR desision..

    Soo, this is life on his terms. We didn't accuse, ask a ton of questions just enjoyed what was in the moment. and I'm ok, he's ok......He's got whatever he decides to do. There is peace in this..
     
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  2. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    You make this sound easy mof and we all know it's not. You made it through this gathering with great strength and pride. Respecting choices and boundaries is very difficult when they don't jive with our own life choices. Well done!
    :bravo:
     
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  3. mof

    mof Momdidntsignupforthis

    Thank you.... it felt to know its not in my hands.....weird, but I will take it.
     
  4. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    "We didn't accuse, ask a ton of questions just enjoyed what was in the moment. and I'm ok, he's ok......He's got whatever he decides to do. There is peace in this.."

    Good job mof. Enjoy your peace!
     
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  5. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet

    Mof

    This is a move in the right direction for your family. I am glad for you all and I hope and pray it continues.

    We just want our kids healthy and happy and many do it on their own terms and their own way and that is okay!