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Substance Abuse
Is this how it usually goes??
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<blockquote data-quote="Littleboylost" data-source="post: 717932" data-attributes="member: 21895"><p>KSM</p><p>Sadly I agree it looks like she is still calling the shots and resenting her time in rehab vs really working with it. I am dealing with a CD AS myself. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Down and done well said SWOT! I lean and gain so much strength from these valuable words. Someone said the other day; No is a complete scentense. </p><p></p><p>Unfortunately if she is calling shots and placing demands; she may well be holding her recovery as ransom, and use you as the excuse to relapse....you don't own it, you can't change it, and you can't control it. That is hers to own. </p><p></p><p>I have learned with detachment practice that I can empathize with my son and explain to him my love is unconditional but my boundaries and living agreements are NOT. I owe this knowledge and so much strength to many on this forum. </p><p></p><p>It's messy and ugly and hard, so very hard to love and not enable. But as we know nothing changes if nothing changes. </p><p></p><p>I would reccomned seeking support for yourself and putting a disaster plan in place; so you have the strength and support to love and not enable when she returns. </p><p></p><p>Is an interim residence a possibility? </p><p></p><p>AS SWOT once taught me, if your addict is Pd off at you, your probably doing something right. </p><p></p><p>Hang in here keep posting and love and strength to you. </p><p></p><p>We are still in the process of getting our train wreck into the shop for repair. Ugh!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Littleboylost, post: 717932, member: 21895"] KSM Sadly I agree it looks like she is still calling the shots and resenting her time in rehab vs really working with it. I am dealing with a CD AS myself. Down and done well said SWOT! I lean and gain so much strength from these valuable words. Someone said the other day; No is a complete scentense. Unfortunately if she is calling shots and placing demands; she may well be holding her recovery as ransom, and use you as the excuse to relapse....you don't own it, you can't change it, and you can't control it. That is hers to own. I have learned with detachment practice that I can empathize with my son and explain to him my love is unconditional but my boundaries and living agreements are NOT. I owe this knowledge and so much strength to many on this forum. It's messy and ugly and hard, so very hard to love and not enable. But as we know nothing changes if nothing changes. I would reccomned seeking support for yourself and putting a disaster plan in place; so you have the strength and support to love and not enable when she returns. Is an interim residence a possibility? AS SWOT once taught me, if your addict is Pd off at you, your probably doing something right. Hang in here keep posting and love and strength to you. We are still in the process of getting our train wreck into the shop for repair. Ugh! [/QUOTE]
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Is this how it usually goes??
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