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...is this still enabling?
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<blockquote data-quote="elizabrary" data-source="post: 749164" data-attributes="member: 11235"><p>I see this as the slippery slope. Our adult children are masters at taking a mile when you give them an inch. It's how they function. I have to be very clear in my boundaries with my daughter or she behaves in this way. She doesn't do it so much anymore. Probably because I set and maintained boundaries and she also became more mature over time. I really struggled to understand boundaries as I had very few and when I was a child there weren't many boundaries for me in my home. When I question myself now I remember this: enabling is doing something for an adult that they are capable of doing for themselves. Is your son capable of taking care of his own nutritional needs? Yes, even though he may not want to. Now, if he was an adult with developmental disabilities this would be a different story. But he is a grown man who could hold a job but chooses not to. Since that is his choice he must deal with the consequences of it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="elizabrary, post: 749164, member: 11235"] I see this as the slippery slope. Our adult children are masters at taking a mile when you give them an inch. It's how they function. I have to be very clear in my boundaries with my daughter or she behaves in this way. She doesn't do it so much anymore. Probably because I set and maintained boundaries and she also became more mature over time. I really struggled to understand boundaries as I had very few and when I was a child there weren't many boundaries for me in my home. When I question myself now I remember this: enabling is doing something for an adult that they are capable of doing for themselves. Is your son capable of taking care of his own nutritional needs? Yes, even though he may not want to. Now, if he was an adult with developmental disabilities this would be a different story. But he is a grown man who could hold a job but chooses not to. Since that is his choice he must deal with the consequences of it. [/QUOTE]
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