It's going to be a rough weekend...

Mom2oddson

Active Member
First... I come from a very small family. On my Mom's side there is Mom and Grandma. On my Dad's side there are a few more people but still under 30 and that is going into second and third cousins - all of them living on the East Coast. This weekend, there is a family wedding on my Dad's side. It's going to be like a reunion is some ways. We've been planning to go for over a year. ....but now we have Grandma. The wedding is on the East Coast and Grandma is here with us on the West Coast. Grandma can't travel so someone had to stay home and take care of her. I volunteered. My Dad needs to see his family! He and Mom were willing to miss it so I could go, but that wasn't right.

So, I'm going to be a bit down this weekend. Yet, I can't show any of that in front of Grandma because it would mean that I love my Dad's family and hate her of course. That is how she is. It's not easy to keep up a happy front when you are sad.

Add to this the wear and tear of taking care of Grandma. The first this she asked us was if we would take her gambling on Sunday. We said we would but we would take just her. Don't tell Grumpus. So what does she do... she tells Grumpus that she's going gambling but he can't. We didn't think that was right, especially since his grand-daughter is getting married on Saturday and he can't be there. So we made arrangements to take Grumpus too on Sunday. Then last night, husband is called into work for BOTH days this weekend. This means that I get to take both grandparents to the Casino by myself. It usually takes TWO adults for each of them. This is going to be a very bad/rough weekend.

And now the tooth that I can't afford to have pulled until September is starting to hurt.
 

Wiped Out

Well-Known Member
Staff member
Major hugs and good thoughts coming your way. I'm sorry you are having to miss out on the wedding and that you are having to deal with everything else on top of it! You deserve a medal!!
 

Hound dog

Nana's are Beautiful
((hugs))

Is there any hope of getting Grandma and Grumpas involved in the local senior citizen center's activities? Here they literally have TONS of activities. I actually can't wait until I'm old enough, I'm gonna be one active senior. lol

Was thinking that may be a good way to get some breaks in their daily care.
 

Mom2oddson

Active Member
Lisa - Grumpus refuses to get involved with anything including all the activities at the nursing home thus the name Grumpus. And Grandma refuses to do anything without my Mom or I attached to her hip. We are lucky she visits Grumpus without us having to sit there.

Steph - I'm trying to get husband's Aunt to come with me. The biggest part is when we get there. Neither of my grandparents can stand on their own and both of them try to get out of the car before you've even come to a complete stop. They are both going to end up on the ground with broken hips if someone isn't there to stop/catch them. Once grandma is in front of a slot machine, she won't move until I force her to go home. Grumpus will put $5 in the machince and soon as his money is gone, he has to move to another machine. So, every 5 minutes you have to move him and the heavy chairs that sit infront of the slot machines.

Thanks for the support and hugs. It seems like a small thing but it's not! It really means a lot.
 

Hound dog

Nana's are Beautiful
It won't help you this weekend, but maybe if one of you did go with grandma to some of the activities at the senior center she'd get hooked on them and eventually want to go alone...... But I know what you mean. I worked on mother in law for years to go, ours is really fantastic and have tons of fun things going on all the time, but she just kept telling me she didn't like hanging out with "old people"......most of the folks at the center were young enough to be her kids. lol

been there done that with mother in law and it's not easy. It takes it's toll on you if there is no one who will step in and at least give you guys breaks once in a while. Trust me, I know. Heck, if you lived close enough, I'd come and give you guys a break.

Hugs
 

keista

New Member
They are both going to end up on the ground with broken hips if someone isn't there to stop/catch them.

:devil:Problem solved! They both end up in the hospital and then aftercare/rehab.

Hey! We're allowed to THINK the bad stuff, aren't we?

((((HUGS))))) and strength out to you.
 

Mom2oddson

Active Member
I have the easy end of the deal. I'm the break for Mom so I only have to deal 24/7 a few times a year. It's my Mom that is wearing out. And she refuses to acknowledge that Grandma is causing stress in her life. I have a feeling that my Mom seeing admitting there is stress as a disloyalty to Grandma. easy child noticed right away how much his Grammy has aged since Easter.

And my Mom feels so guilty if Grandma is upset in any way. Mom also feels responsible for their happiness. She thinks she should be able to make grumpy people happy. No matter how many times I tell her it's not her job and that she CAN'T make them happy - they need to choose to be happy, it doesn't help.

So, even though it's going to be a rough weekend - I know that my Mom is relaxing and getting some down time, so I don't mind.
 

MuM_of_OCD_kiddo

New Member
Don't have much advise for you [other than that you deserve a margarita or a beer afterwards, whatever LOL]. But for them being out of the car and taking off - I suggest - to turn on your child safety switches on the back doors and make them sit in the back. That way they have to wait until you get around to let them out...
 

AnnieO

Shooting from the Hip
My car is set up so no one can get out till after the people in the front do. However... When you have to get their wheelchairs or walkers... Ugh. Yeah, if you've got child safety locks, USE EM.
 
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