Janet...What's up with the Buck situation?

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by lovemysons, Jan 31, 2012.

  1. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    I started to say "bucked up" situation, lol.

    I saw you on various threads just now...went to do some dishes and was thinking, hmm, is that Buck Character living with you and Tony now?
    How's that goin?

  2. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    yes he is here. He is like having a 12 year old living in the house. The only somewhat good thing about having him here is that he keeps the kitchen clean. That helps. I am finding out that I need to specify what I want to have for dinner quite early in the day or he will start cooking something else and use up ingredients I have planned for other things without my knowing it.

    Now Billy and I are being held responsible for doing all the running him around to take him to do all the stupid stuff he needs to do like go get an ID because he cant change his DL without having insurance which he cant afford, he cant get the ID without something showing that he lives in NC which means he needs something like a denial letter or approval letter from Social Services or a bill from a utility company. Obviously he doesnt have bills.

    He was stupid enough to go to social services today before I could tell him what to say plus on the last day of the month which will mean he only gets emergency food stamps for one day. How stupid. He can only get stamps for 3 months and that 1 day will count as one of his months. I cant believe no one asked me. Of course, no one ever asks me before they do anything. Tony yells at me and says I should know what he is doing before he does it. Okay, yeah. Be right on that one. Shining up my crystal ball.

    Tomorrow I have to sit down with him and have him help me fill out for unemployment in SC even though we dont think it will happen. Food Stamps requires it. Then we can sign him up online with Job Services here to look for work. We need to call a few places to find out if the local chicken plant or hog plant still runs a bus to pick people up. That would be perfect. There is no way he could get there on his own. Otherwise, Im lost. Supposedly he can now get his car back if he pays to have it fixed and pays the remaining balance. I am not sure what the amount it is to get it fixed, and he owes a little over $400. I swear I would just dump that car and get something else but oh no, no one is listening to me.
  3. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    Geez Janet,
    So he's Tony's brother but YOU'RE the one expected to take him places and help him fill out applications, etc. I sure hope this doesn't cause long-term resentment between you and Tony.

    Did you and Tony talk about how long he can stay with you? Is there a departure date?

    I would be really irritated with the whole situation if it were me.
  4. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I may start drinking or become an addict myself. Sigh.
  5. HaoZi

    HaoZi Guest

    I take it he didn't give enough notice to be able to transfer to a BK in your area?
  6. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    ((hugs)) Janet

    I'd be leaning toward him helping with the heavy duty cleaning needed to be done around there as a means to pay his own way. Obviously he knows how to clean since he's keeping the kitchen clean. (that's something at least)
  7. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    That would mean me being around him in long periods of time to watch him and I am not yet able to do that. Most things that come out of his mouth just irritate the tea total koi out of me. Tonight he was informing me of the fact that he makes the most "amazing" painted Indian rocks that he has never, ever seen anyone do before anywhere. Only he can do them. He also makes these carved pipes for people to smoke whatever in. He paints them or varnishes them but because he is Indian he does the...they are native american koi. Bugs the koi out of me. I pointed out that he is supposed to be working on his sobriety and I dont think that is such a good idea and besides that they could be considered paraphernalia. I got reamed by Tony.

    I already have to help him fill out paperwork because he cant fill it out on his own. Tony cant do it so it falls on me. Blah.
  8. lovemysons

    lovemysons Well-Known Member

    Good Grief Janet...
    You can't even speak your mind to this guy?
    What's the matter with this Buck character...Why is Tony so protective of his feelings?

    Oh not good,
  9. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I'm so sorry! (((((hugs))))) I would be SO tempted to do some of the things I pm'd you about. SOOOOO Tempted. And I am NOT always good at avoiding temptation when it makes my life easier in untenable situation.

    What, exactly, would Buck have to do to get Tony to stop this koi? How can we entice Buck to do those things? Just my twisted thought. I think Tony should be kissing your FEET and giving massages to them every night to thank you for all this. there is so little reason for this, esp as your area has so little services and where he was had so many. Of course, he may have run through all of them, which may end up as a NASTY surprise to you when the applications are done.
  10. buddy

    buddy New Member

    gosh Janet you are doing amazing given the situation... I just can't imagine. He is so lucky you are even willing to do one little thing for him. He sounds very developmentally delayed in so many areas.....

    HUGS and good thoughts for some options to open up for him... to get him to that boarding house FAST
  11. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Honestly I dont know what I am going to do but I have stopped worrying about it. There comes a time when you just have to sort of deal with what is happening...or not. I am not willing to throw everything away because of Buck. I could, and there are a few people who think I should just toss the past 28 years away like a dirty sock, but I dont know that I can do that so easily. Maybe if I was healthier and able to still work for the next 15 years or so then I might be willing to consider leaving but in reality, I am simply stuck. Tony and I both need each other. We have woven our lives together in such a way that really neither of us can go. Its always been that way.