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Substance Abuse
Jeez. Do the lies ever stop?
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 630842" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>thank you---warm hugs. No, the lies don't ever stop as long as they are using, and even after they are in recovery for a long, long time. </p><p></p><p>Basically, we can't believe anything that comes out of their mouths. And that is a very sad place to be with someone you love.</p><p></p><p>I remember a counselor once telling me---when I was in marriage counseling toward the end of my marriage---she drew a pyramid on the flip chart paper and divided it into about six blocks. The long block at the base of the pyramid---one long block---was trust.</p><p></p><p>She said: You can't have a relationship without trust.</p><p></p><p>I will never forget that. </p><p></p><p>She said you will have to rebuild the trust within your marriage if it is ever to work. My trust was shot. That was a sad day for me.</p><p></p><p>thank you, if you can, let him handle it. He can handle it with the folks in rehab. He can tell them about the legal situation, and they can help him make contact with the proper people, if that is what he decides to do. </p><p></p><p>If you can, thank you, just don't do anything. Nothing. </p><p></p><p>Take this time, thank you, to TURN and focus on you. Turn away from this painful, sad situation, knowing that your son is in the very best possible place he can be today. There is nothing you can do to save him or fix him or convince him to stop.</p><p></p><p>But, they can, if he is willing. </p><p></p><p>thank you, you CAN get off the roller coaster, and you will have to learn how to do that, one day at a time. Today, do at least one nice thing for yourself. And then, buy the book, Codependent No more, if you don't have it already. </p><p></p><p>Keep sharing here. We get it. I am so sorry for your pain today. Warm Hugs, thank you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 630842, member: 17542"] thank you---warm hugs. No, the lies don't ever stop as long as they are using, and even after they are in recovery for a long, long time. Basically, we can't believe anything that comes out of their mouths. And that is a very sad place to be with someone you love. I remember a counselor once telling me---when I was in marriage counseling toward the end of my marriage---she drew a pyramid on the flip chart paper and divided it into about six blocks. The long block at the base of the pyramid---one long block---was trust. She said: You can't have a relationship without trust. I will never forget that. She said you will have to rebuild the trust within your marriage if it is ever to work. My trust was shot. That was a sad day for me. thank you, if you can, let him handle it. He can handle it with the folks in rehab. He can tell them about the legal situation, and they can help him make contact with the proper people, if that is what he decides to do. If you can, thank you, just don't do anything. Nothing. Take this time, thank you, to TURN and focus on you. Turn away from this painful, sad situation, knowing that your son is in the very best possible place he can be today. There is nothing you can do to save him or fix him or convince him to stop. But, they can, if he is willing. thank you, you CAN get off the roller coaster, and you will have to learn how to do that, one day at a time. Today, do at least one nice thing for yourself. And then, buy the book, Codependent No more, if you don't have it already. Keep sharing here. We get it. I am so sorry for your pain today. Warm Hugs, thank you. [/QUOTE]
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Jeez. Do the lies ever stop?
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