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<blockquote data-quote="Echolette" data-source="post: 691932" data-attributes="member: 17269"><p>Copa,</p><p></p><p>I absolutely feel you on this. My SO is much more detail oriented than I am. He notices everything that has been moved or out of place, and then wants to know why...or worse, conjures an explanation that is rarely benign. I absolutely play a placating, somewhat infantalized role of apologies and promises to take care of things or do better. It is my house. I do the shopping cooking and bill paying. He does all the maintenance and all the fixing of all the broken things (and there are lot). My sons live there as well, and are more like me than like he is. WE are, in fact, kind of messy. I had a lot of shame about that. I am slowly, slowly feeling that it is not for him to dictate the level of organization or cleanliness of the house, not for us to hop to his standards. And yet...implementing that realization is challenging pretty much every day. Following the comments with interest!</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>and SWOT,this is so clear and simply fabulous. It is testimony to the degree of my subjegation that I could not POSSIBLY have conceived of such a simple and true response myself. But I do think I am capable of using yours.</p><p></p><p>Copa, let us work on this together. </p><p></p><p>Echo</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Echolette, post: 691932, member: 17269"] Copa, I absolutely feel you on this. My SO is much more detail oriented than I am. He notices everything that has been moved or out of place, and then wants to know why...or worse, conjures an explanation that is rarely benign. I absolutely play a placating, somewhat infantalized role of apologies and promises to take care of things or do better. It is my house. I do the shopping cooking and bill paying. He does all the maintenance and all the fixing of all the broken things (and there are lot). My sons live there as well, and are more like me than like he is. WE are, in fact, kind of messy. I had a lot of shame about that. I am slowly, slowly feeling that it is not for him to dictate the level of organization or cleanliness of the house, not for us to hop to his standards. And yet...implementing that realization is challenging pretty much every day. Following the comments with interest! and SWOT,this is so clear and simply fabulous. It is testimony to the degree of my subjegation that I could not POSSIBLY have conceived of such a simple and true response myself. But I do think I am capable of using yours. Copa, let us work on this together. Echo [/QUOTE]
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