just got back from school - had to bring difficult child home...

[ksm]

She called and was crying and all upset about some "girl drama" and wanted to come home. It was 1pm and only had a little over two hours left, but I told her to go to the nurses station and I would meet her there. Luckily the nurse had her in a room when I arrived and she had been giving her good advice about ignoring girls who wanted to cause drama. She told difficult child to walk away, and if the girl follows her, then she should find an adult. Supposedly my difficult child was "talking ****" about some other girl. difficult child denies it. I don't have a clue what really happened. I do know that she either "likes" someone, or she can't stand them. New classes started two weeks ago... and today on the way to school, she told me she doesn't like any on the other students in the algebra class, but the teacher is OK. How can you dislike a whole class that you just started? It's math, so it isn't like there would be a lot on interaction in a math class as compared to things like PE or classes that work as a group. She no longer "likes" the kids at church. I think it probably has more to do about not being the center of attention than anything they might say or do towards her. I have a feeling that difficult child wouldn't even have to "talk ****" about another girl - but everyone else would know exactly how she feels about that person - her face can't hide her true feelings. I have had many "looks" that let everyone else know just how she feels about me.

Tomorrow is her therapy appointment - and of course she doesn't want to go - but I will make sure she gets there. I haven't even told her about the neuropsychologist appointment in April.

I have been reading a book "Damaged Angels" and see so much of my difficult child in the information in the book. Now I am wondering if difficult child's biomom also has difficulties because maybe her mom also used alcohol?? What a vicious cycle. KSM

 

[TerryJ2]

Arrgh! typical teen drama X 10.
I'm sorry.
She sounds like a black and white thinker and a catastrophizer. Shades of my difficult child.
I'm so glad she's got therapy tomorrow. This is the perfect topic for a therapist to help with.
And thank you for the book idea! I'm going to look for it.

 

[TerryJ2]

Oh, it's about alcohol during pregnancy. Interesting but not applicable to us.

Let us know how it goes tomorrow. Hugs.

 

[ksm]

Oh, it's about alcohol during pregnancy. Interesting but not applicable to us. Let us know how it goes tomorrow. Hugs.

When a child is adopted, how does one really know what happened... esp when the birth mom may not have even realized she was pregnant at first. THose first few months are critical. I do know that biomom drank while pregnant with our difficult child... as my son met her and he said they were both doing lots of drinking and some drugs. She was probably 2 months pregnant when they met, and continued for two more months before "realizing" she was pregnant. Her daughter is so like her mom... that is why I wonder if biomom's problems are also caused by prenatal alcohol... 4 children by 4 different guys... no real work history. Can't keep a job for more than a couple of weeks, can't plan ahead for anything. Can't be on time, can't remember appointments, alienates almost everyone eventually, and then blames everyone else for her problems... I just don't want that for difficult child's future. She is bright, pretty, a talented singer... but also moody, stubborn, and won't listen to advice or mere suggestions. KSM

 

[buddy]

That's so true. I have had Q evaluated and was told no, and that his bio had been monitored even before she was preg which is why she "voluntarily" checked in when she found out she was preggers....she was clean and stayed that way her whole pregnancy and he was born clean...

Supposedly.


But who really knows?

I figure, if he can get help from people who understand those issues, with his history plus the brain injury and the Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) diagnosis, well I will take all we can get.

It makes a huge difference in approach and expectations when you can have confirmation that there is a brain injury due to chemicals/alcohol . If there is even a chance, we have to explore that option. It colors all of the other issues.